Eulogy For A Hole Punch Guy He was a hole punch kinda guy.

New Substack thing:
open.substack.com/pub/mrmarkgr...

TOMORROW!

THE EXORCISM AT BUCKINGHAM PALACE is out!! Ahhh!

I’ll be signing it at Golden Apple in LA.

I want to do a remake of that Kenan and Kel film starring the guy who played Mahoney in Police Academy and call it Guttenberger.

What Brian Saw Many cats had been here before, but Brian was the first to see it for what it really was.

New substack thing:
open.substack.com/pub/mrmarkgr...

No, you measure the distance to Judgement Day in Edward Furlongs.

Fun fact: The best way to measure children is in Robert Miles.

This is what social media is for. Popping in for 5 seconds, seeing a video of Crime Traveller, thinking "I used to love that." then getting away from social media before the rot sets in.
Anyway, thanks for sharing.

Buttons “Where are the buttons?” said Argely, failing to hide the frustration in his voice.

New Substack thing
open.substack.com/pub/mrmarkgr...

Is it Barry Keoghan or Ezra Miller?

I will never guess right first time.

All Downhill From Here The wind was harsh on his face, the cold cruel on his joints, but he persisted.

New Substack thing.
mrmarkgranger.substack.com/p/all-downhi...

Mark Granger | Substack I am a writer. I write comedy for TV and radio, and I write a bunch of other things.

Doing a substack.
It will be almost exclusively 100 Word Stories at least once a week.
Check it out if you want.
substack.com/@mrmarkgranger

Hey! I like Mel C.

Very proud to have written a joke for The Weakest Link that got this reaction out of Johnny Vegas.

Got some very stupid poems in this Stupid Poetry Zine.
One is probably the stupidest thing I've written.

A picture of me at the beach. I'm wearing a blue cap and a dark blue hoodie. I'm almost certainly wearing trousers and shoes too but they aren't in the photo.

Sometime I wish I knew how to use social media so people would engage with my stuff and maybe hire me for work.

But then I realise I hate social media.

Anyway.

This is me.

www.markgranger.com

Interior artists! Drop your portfolios!

@heatherantos.bsky.social (and Rai) will be reviewing shortly.

The Day The Noise Ended — MARK GRANGER Sound fell out of the world. Just a decibel at a time at first. Then in huge chunks.

This is my favourite.
www.markgranger.com/100-words-1/...

100 Words — MARK GRANGER

And if you like my stories, I have over a hundred 100 word stories here.
www.markgranger.com/100-words-1

This is out.
Which is nice.
Check it out, along with everything else of mine that is available here:
www.markgranger.com/fiction

Weird eye related lyrics that annoy me:

1. "Look me in the eyeball" - Love The Way You Lie: Eminem ft. Rihanna. Dude, you're a lyrical genius, but nobody has ever said look me in the eyeball.

2. "I wanna kiss your eyes" - Shivers: Ed Sheeran. Do people do this? I feel weird just thinking about it.

Sanctuary is top tier Di'Anno. You are a fool.
It was added to the '98 remasters, don't know why it's not on streaming.
I'm only writing this because I'm procrastinating from work.
I don't really care.
But this has reminded me to actually listen to the podcast. I'd forgotten it existed.

🚨And I wrote one of them. So come on and support new narrative comedy. Where else are you getting SIX brand new sitcoms?👇
www.bigfinish.com/releases/v/c...

This is gonna be so fucking good, I can't wait to show people what we've been brewing up the past year

Give Chris money to make a book.
The first one was great.
And if it's anything like the first one there'll be about 90% more jokes than your average kids book.

Cover art for Behind the Revolving Door: An Anthology of Choices Vol 2. A grey revolving door against a blue wall.

Behind the Revolving Door: An Anthology of Choices Vol 2 is coming out December 1st.

My story 'The Valley That Wasn't There' will be in it.

So that's cool.

Til All the Pieces Fit, by Scott Sorry from the album When We Were Kings

My favourite of his solo stuff.
scottsorry.bandcamp.com/track/til-al...

a woman with glasses is standing in front of a door and saying `` i 'm a nice person ! '' ALT: a woman with glasses is standing in front of a door and saying `` i 'm a nice person ! ''

The problem with social media for me, is if I don't see something cool within 5 minutes I'm bored.
Anyway, hire me to write your thing.
I proper nice and everything.

New Kickstarter reward!

I’ve added a mini comedy writing guide as a reward option for backers of CHEESE: Lights! Crackers! Action!

Interested in writing comedy? This is for you!

www.kickstarter.com/projects/thi...

Flaming Youth YouTube video by KISS - Topic

youtu.be/Twa0YIJs9L0?...

Out today! Judge Dread Magazine 485, including a new Armitage story scripted by me, art by @stazjohnson.bsky.social, colours by Quinton Winter and letters by Annie Parkhouse.

There's a serial killer loose in Brit-Cit and everyone's favourite curmudgeon is on strict orders to keep clear...

#ncbd