thank you for blessing my morning with this.

a bunch of weirdos are about to see my ass because guess who forgot to wear a slip today

may their hubris be the majority of their legacy.

his diet and snorting coke off a toilet seat are very suggestive evidence of wormies tho

no i think trump is piss passionate.

if someone paid me $450k during covid i woulda paid off my house and then split the difference with the two other owners, then made ALL of it back when we sold it 2 years later.

that woulda been cool.

which one is it cuz some of these lists are wild

i love this take

shocker the replies are sexist and fatpobic. that problematic behavior isn’t suddenly okay cuz folks don’t like her.

Picture of Mr Met, text RIP TO EVERYONE KILLED BY THE GODS FOR THEIR HUBRIS BUT IM DIFFERENT AND BETTER, MAYBE EVEN BETTER THAN THE GODS imgflip.com

idk i think he was pretty passionate about getting pissed on 😀

RIP images then, I guess

whenever russia leaks the golden shower tape

also tell all my econ and physics friends everyone at an ivy gets an A, i dare you to provoke a physics student on edge.

oh boy they found their lane to create the church of america didn’t they

HEY PAY ATTENTION TO THIS BECAUSE IT’S PROBABLY GONNA HIT SCOTUS AND IS A GATEWAY TO OVERTURNING SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE, WHICH, IF YOU WATCH PENTAGON BRIEFINGS, IS VERY MUCH ON THE MENU.

they call them boneless wings because “saucey tossed chicken chunks” was harder to fit on the menu

this is the new american dream

i know who stancil is and holy fuck do i wish i didn‘t

i hate it when i quietly experience an ironic moment with someone else and they aren’t on that wavelength.

come on! we just went through somethint together! BOND WITH ME!

that last one is my favorite part, because it requires an extensive review of facts surrounding the situation and typically threatens to expose worse information.

there are public figures whom have been defamed, and those cases are NOT funny. they're almost always bleak.

defamation lawsuits from public figures with already bad reputations are extremely funny to me. the burden of proof for a public figure is to prove a few things:
- actual malice (as opposed to satire which is fair game)
- harm done
- that the information is untrue

they probably already are. most of these folks go online to rage and, when they finally put down the rectangular hell portal, return to their otherwise undisturbed lives happily voting blue no matter who (their indifference hurts).

it took that long? damn they’re off their game.

promising myself i won’t write a poem about this until i know i can get away with it

why did the word “jagweed” go out of style. i feel like more people would behave if we brought the word jagweed back into vernacular

try telling them harris was a shitty candidate and watch how quickly they accuse you of voting for trump. they’re just playing team sports and chose the blue team.

in other news

how much avocado is too much avocado? asking for myself.

i want to call attention to two things:

the not quite a dog whistle racism and anti-semitism in his nicknames for jeffries and schumer

and the fact that 60 minutes is being slashed in the throat by one of his friends and one of his dipshit sycophants

i could name a few prominent community members that are like this, but i don‘t want to go through the trouble of making a new account when they block me for trying to call them out a second time.

us more offline folks have taken notice and are keeping tabs of who to ignore.