like how does one recover

DENTIST: Have you been flossing?

ME: Have you?

DENTIST: (sweating) THIS ISN’T ABOUT ME!

damn.

hey siri all safeties off

not at all insane things happening in playoff hockey

an ex once messaged me that things were better, that she was only thinking of me every few days or so, and i’m looking back on that like, damn, you know, i think about Walter more often than that

lol im blocked

LFGGGGGGG

the absolute state of the wing span on her

the tomcat posting will continue until morale improves

The Phantom rips never a dull moment imma watch it this week

What is that clip from??

im smokin that bamboo pentagon pack. zonked off one hit of that loud that makes you survive operation menu

if there’s one lesson that i - as a CI guy - feel entirely qualified to lecture SOFheads about, it’s that attempting to parachute indigenous assets into occupied territory is never a good idea

i can easily see you wearing both of these outfits

realizing i mainly use claude for (a) book recommendations because google results are so bad now and (b) corpo-speak-ifiying my emails

gigan when the A-10 on the flight line

i’d like everyone celebrating today to know that the beppo skit on SNL was actually about me and no i can’t elaborate because the government won’t let me

The First WORLD FENCING LEAGUE is happening April 25th!!! I'M GEEKING!!!

Japanese engineers developed this "Sword Tip Visualisation" tracking technology specifically for this event that will make it so much easier for the average person to see what's going on!

I MUST WATCH THIS ENTIRE TOURNAMENT

On the 7th day, God rested. And on the 8th day, God was back at it, creating value for shareholders

Like "Byzantium had a Viking imperial guard for 500 years" sounds like some fake paradox games bullshit but it's not

WHO IS THIS FOR

words to live by

From “The Simpsons” house genius John Swartzwelder, interviewed in The New Yorker by Mike Sacks

get off my lawn

NOT ACCORDING TO THE THIRD AMENDMENT YOU DON’T

looks great so far!!!

almost as if you’re on a highway of some kind