My brain sometimes does math automatically. This is a super fun feature that I cannot turn off.

What I am thinking when someone says “420”

1. 80 (4x20)
2. 1/5 (4/20 reduced)
3. weed

Photo of TV screen Mariners Baseball The A's and Mariners S logo appear to spell out the word ass

It's the ass series in Seattle

I love that we keep saying “he’s the best player that’s ever lived” and then he gets *better*

Avalanche forever

Happy Patriots’ Day. Baseball at 11am, marathon, shoe beers in the stands.

With the help of the Sandy Hook families, The Onion has reached a long-awaited deal to take over InfoWars.

We've enlisted the help of @timheidecker.bsky.social, who will be InfoWars' Creative Director.

Please stand by for more.

This happened on April 1 too

S: Wah wah wah (Ms Rachel & Mamdani version), swish swish swish
A: Beep beep beep
B: Open and shut, up and down
C: Wah wah wah (anyone else), move on back
D: Shh Shh Shh

Amen

Ha yes they are

Your lipstick, his collar, don't bother, angel
I know exactly what goes on

if I feel just a little bit hopeful won't you tell me that feeling's okay?

New playlist! 13 bangers! Plus: getting to the gig is the cure for [male] loneliness, some sad Red Sox stats, and a new poem.

Apple TV scorebug, Tigers vs Red Sox. D00B!

DOOB

He told me they were backed up to July for surgery but somehow I got a date next month. Whew!

Thanks Nick!

if I feel just a little bit hopeful won't you tell me that feeling's okay?

New playlist! 13 bangers! Plus: getting to the gig is the cure for [male] loneliness, some sad Red Sox stats, and a new poem.

Not to toot my own horn but my ENT had this to say about my sinus blockage that has been ruining my life for about six months: “I’m not going to sugarcoat it, it’s not the worst I’ve ever seen but it’s right up there.” It's an honor just to be nominated or whatever.

TEXAS IS THE REASONNNNNN

Today, I release a new song, “Speck of a Spark.” Consider it an invitation to a new album journey, which I announce May 1st. 🤘🤘🤘

music.apple.com/us/album/spe...

Nothing makes me feel older than hearing someone say “the 1900s”

Young pope Leo, undated but he appears to be in his teens or early 20’s

young pope leo looks like a ska scene regular who goes by Upbeat but no one knows his real name

Fear Elements - "Turn Around" International indie duo unleashes the fuzz on loud third single

Listen to this song and then tell me the last song that knocked the wind out of you

Dope Nose by Weezer on Apple Music Song · 2002 · Duration 2:17

Justice for Maladroit

Screenshot of MLB Transaction Bot feed on Bluesky. Every player "changed number to 42" because it's Jackie Robinson day, where everyone wears #42 so the bot went crazy with a post for each player.

Happy Jackie Robinson day! @mlbtransactionbot.bsky.social

For the times that you wanna go
and bust rhymes real slow
I'll appear, slap you on the face
And Trump backs down
In the Pope row

Perennial '65, by Perennial 5 track album

The mainstream media doesn’t want you to know but you can talk about artists other than Geese

josaleighpollett.bandcamp.com/album/in-the...

aplaceforowls.bandcamp.com/album/how-we...

perennialtheband.bandcamp.com/album/perenn...

elliottgreenmusic.bandcamp.com/album/s-t

Mick Abel spray chart vs BOS 4/14/26. The Sox have just four singles and one deep fly out, the rest of their outs are in the infield. Pathetic.

The Red Sox are pathetic. 10 Ks, no walks, can barely get it out of the infield.

Consider Broken Record for your cool new indie band needs

Fear Elements - "Turn Around" International indie duo unleashes the fuzz on loud third single

Let's all listen to Fear Elements