He finally stopped, but at almost the exact same moment that his younger sister decided to stop using a toilet. 🫠

A couple months later I wound up in the ER when I cut my finger because I was so exhausted despite sleeping 10-12 hours a day, and the ER doctor diagnosed me with mono. Know what you're not supposed to do when you have mono? Exercise! It can rupture your spleen.

When I was in my 20s, I had a period when I was so tired that I didn't do anything but work and sleep and the bare minimum of ADLs. I was showering, but not wearing makeup and that's not like me at all. A friend was so concerned that she dragged me to an urgent care and I was told to exercise more.

And if you happen to be a zebra or unicorn instead of a plain old horse, it's your own fault for being difficult!

He weighed 115 pounds (like 98th percentile for his age; my dad was massive, and my son is on nearly the same growth trajectory) and I have hEDS and he has been able to dislocate my joints since he was two and a half.

But they just have their little lists hat work for most typical situations!

Or just have a checklist of the most common solutions and tick them off & look at what is left that hasn't been tried, and WHY those haven't been tried. When my son was 10, it was recommended that we physically pick him up and move him when he was having a tantrum and was at risk of breaking stuff.

The last time I left a family therapy session, I sat in my car and screamed, "I NEVER IN MY FUCKING LIFE THOUGHT TO MAKING A FUCKING CHECKLIST! HOW FUCKING FOOLISH OF ME! THIS COULD HAVE SOLVED ALL MY PROBLEMS WITH MY OPPOSITIONAL KID WHO CHOOSES TO PISS IN HIS BED INSTEAD OF THE DAMN TOILET!"

I have stopped seeking help for things because I'm annoyed at the number of times I have sought help and have been presented with The Most Obvious Solution.

Oh, a checklist for my son's chores? Broken down to the most granular level of tasks? Like, pick up all the laundry, the trash, make the bed?

It is for sure!

But also there are some weirdos out there doing backyard breeding of Franken-mutts, which is how my family wound up with a Chihua-Capoo Terrier, which was as ugly as it sounds. (But Leroy was the kind of ugly that when people said he was ugly, they meant it as a compliment.)

This is a very silly law. It's always optional. I'm always allowed to call someone a hemorrhoidal asshole instead of "Mr. President."

Also a lot of cuts to funding for programs for kids, stuff like after school activities and community spaces where kids could hang out supervised. Those years also appear to coincide with the housing bubble before the 08 collapse, when many had to work a lot more hours to afford a home.

"Pounding his schnitzel" is my new favorite euphemism.

We are unsure if that is a shark perched on top of the RV, or a plane with the pilot about to parachute out!

I do change my undies throughout the day, even (especially!) on vacation. My skin does not play well with dampness from sweat or other excretions. I usually wear boxer briefs and even two dozen of those take up barely any space in a suitcase. My bras take up more room.

Or had your PCOS-ruled body decided that *this* is the summer we're not skipping a June period! 😭

A child's drawing showing a large bus shaped vehicle in profile, with a window showing the driver at the front and additional windows showing passengers in their own section, including two cats (our family has 2 cats). There are stairs in the rear of the vehicle, leading up to a second story that has a couch and bed. An object that is either a shark or a plane with a single standing passenger is above the vehicle.

I think my daughter wants us to buy an RV for our next vacation. 😂

How does he not know what a corner store is? I thought he grew up in New York?! I know bodega is the more common term there, but still !

Are the standards in the room with us?

With ma'am or miss I feel like sometimes the person speaking can't win. Some married women get really mad if they get called miss, some unmarried women don't want to be "ma'am"ed because they think it makes them sound old, some women have been called miss too many times in a condescending way...

"Just use your HSA" as though:

1) everyone has an HSA

And

2) people who do have an HSA have any money in it

I do the same, and I know I have screwed up anyway. My brain is so deeply programmed and resists the updated software.

We have a cardinal that nests across the street, but sits right outside our bedroom window every morning in the spring.

I think one must be a mean woman before evolving into a masculine grandma, like a Pokémon.

He does. I still believe that he prefers the campaign trail to the actual job of being President. Campaigning is like being the star of his own reality show. Everyone around him is there to make all the decisions & make him look good; he doesn't have to do anything but talk & let his fans adore him.

He's so obsessed with the size of other people's buildings.

I still can't take my 12 yo to the library unless I plan to have my hands literally on her body the whole time. It's the opposite of restful. The last time we went in, she tried to test how hard it would be to knock the bookshelves over. Thankfully, she wasn't strong enough to accomplish her task.

So, C-SPAN is just writing the SNL cold opens, now?

I want to put $10 on him forgetting to buy the seed potatoes. My husband went to the hardware store yesterday to buy a paper window shade, spent over $100, and forgot the shade.

In my 20 years of marriage, we've had maybe 6 months we didn't have any debt except for our mortgage. We are chipping away pretty well at the last non-mortgage debt, and this week my dental implant fell out.🫠

Somewhere I have a picture of me holding a baby alligator and it has the same vibe.