I can feel myself getting dumber and dumber every day

Steamed Hams full transcript Well, Seymour, I made it- despite your directions. Ah. Superintendent Chalmers. Welcome. - I hope you're prepared for an unforgettable luncheon. - Yeah. Oh, egads! My roast is ruined. But what if I were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking? Delightfully devilish, Seymour. Ah- Skinner with his crazy explanations The superintendent's gonna need his medication When he hears Skinner's lame exaggerations There'll be trouble in town tonight Seymour! Superintendent, I was just- uh, just stretching my calves on the windowsill. Isometric exercise. Care to join me? Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour? Uh- Oh. That isn't smoke. It's steam. Steam from the steamed clams we're having. Mmm. Steamed clams. Whew. Superintendent, I hope you're ready for mouthwatering hamburgers. I thought we were having steamed clams. D'oh, no. I said steamed hams. That's what I call hamburgers. You call hamburgers steamed hams? Yes. It's a regional dialect. - Uh-huh. Uh, what region? - Uh, upstate New York. Really. Well, I'm from Utica, and I've never heard anyone use the phrase "steamed hams. " Oh, not in Utica. No. It's an Albany expression. I see. You know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger. Oh, no. Patented Skinner burgers. Old family recipe. - For steamed hams. - Yes. Yes. And you call them steamed hams despite the fact that they are obviously grilled. Ye- You know, the- One thing I should- - Excuse me for one second. - Of course. Well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all. I'm pooped. Yes. I should be- Good Lord! What is happening in there? - Aurora borealis. - Uh- Aurora borealis at this time of year at this time of day in this part of the country localized entirely within your kitchen? - Yes. - May I see it? No. Seymour. ! The house is on fire. ! No, Mother. It's just the northern lights. Well, Seymour, you are an odd fellow but I must say you steam a good ham.

Today is officially the 30th anniversary of Steamed Hams. On April 14, 1996, "22 Short Films About Springfield" aired for the first time!

Had a rare weekday off from work, and I got more done than I usually do in a month

Had a dream I was hanging out with Jesse Thorn and we were trying to figure out what to do and then WWIII started

The mom from Malcom in the Middle can still get it

never known of anybody who wasn't cool with trans people that wasn't a huge fucking loser

Thinking about getting into NFTs

Snl UK really highlights how stupid comedy is

Where do I buy a cool hat?

Fuck, Marry, Kill: Winter Hymn, Country Hymn, Secret Hymn

I like raps when they’re about reptiles, or summarizing the plot of a movie

Do you think they took that dancing robot out behind the restaurant and shot it?

I'm a moderate on the issue of cars, I don't think they should be banned but I do think they should all be this. Now I know what you're thinking: what if I need to go fast or need more space? That's just too bad

I miss having sex

My TV broke last night, so I spent the evening googling all my ex girlfriends

I made three, in my opinion, pretty good tweets in a row, didn’t get a single like on any of them… is Twitter truly dead? Should I take bsky seriously now?

Ok I’m back on bsky what did I miss

Hey what’s been going on on bsky, anything cool?

So far, no, it’s not

gentleman, gentleman, please, there's no need for this! you are both in the epstein files.

elon musk to donald trump at every meeting in the oval office: “you are in the epstein files. meet my 3 year old son”

Happy Birthday to moms

Thinking about a career change

Hey, are you hiring?

What’s everybody else been up to?

Been replaying The Last Of Us 2. Good game.

Hello Bsky I miss you

I don’t even make that much money a month

The Taking of Pelham One Two Three... good movie

image of watchmen's doctor manhattan, a superhero who is entirely blue and nude, sitting on a rock, small in frame, on what is depicted to be a very pink version of the surface of the planet mars. he looks pensive.

It is 2002. I am 18 years old. We are in a once-in-a-generation economic crisis.

It is 2008. I am 24 years old. We are in a once-in-a-generation economic crisis.

It is 2020. I am 36 years old. We are in a once-in-a-generation economic crisis.

It is 2025. I am 41 years old. We are in a—