You know...I think he just might be a compulsive liar. He just kept saying the wildest things all night.

And OF COURSE he got A's and B's in NURSING SCHOOL while partying and getting blitzed on WEEKDAYS.

WHO TF IS THIS GUY??

Working with a 23yo new grad nurse tonight. F*cker has the body of an Olympian saying he stopped going to the gym because he was "too muscular." He also is handy, runs after working 12 hour shifts, AND f*cking crochets and has hobbies.

I'm gonna f*cking kms this bitch makes me look like TRASH.

Sometimes I go to post the most unhinged and hypersexual stuff on here. Then I remember my digital footprint and how I'm going to be a medical professional pretty soon here.

...also only like 4 people see these and I don't want to make my fans too uncomfortable 😘😘

I once wrote a poem about a toxic relationship and compared it to heroine. I posted it to Tiktok and at least one person missed the metaphor and thought I actually did heroine. So I deleted it just to be safe.

Unfortunately, I lost all copies of it. Which sucks, because it was one of my favorites.

"The world is a better place with you in it."

Is it tho? I'm not preventing wars. Or mass hunger. Or having a rapist president. Or rising medical costs.

At most, I give a few minutes of happiness to someone, which can be accomplished by a TV show or a fidget toy.

A drop does not an ocean make.

I'm VERY pro-choice.

"Well what if your mother had an abortion??"

Then I wouldn't be here in the hellscape timeline! 🥳

I'm thankful for social media for opening my mind, and introducing myself to so many amazing people.

But sometimes I miss the simplicity of when I was sad and alone. At least then I was ignorant that lots of people are living better and happier lives than my own.

MAGA Farmer on the news: "Well first the trade war with China hurt us. Now the war in Iran is risking me losing my farm. Us farmers are struggling!"

Also MAGA Farmer: "🤡 Well I don't know who's to blame! Could be anyone causing this! Who knows! I can't think of any single common denominator! 🤡"

Shhhh, I'm mildly drunk rn.

Two of my mutuals on tiktok (maybe on here too, but I'm not gonna tell) have bfs and although I like them as people and think they're funny and kind, I secretly hate their f*cking guts because how tf are they so cute with hot bfs and I'M lonelier than hell?? 😭😭

Look, I understand it is the job of the supervisor to reach out to people to help cover shifts.

But.

Please just peek at the text history. It's literally been my response the last 3 messages that I am unavailable to pick up any extra shifts through April. 😖

Okay, I got like 6 hours of sleep after a 15 hour work night and am about to do another again tonight...and tomorrow night.

Whatever, it means I'm almost half done with Capstone, just gotta keep grinding. I'll sleep when I'm dead. 🥲🥲

I want to go on a very long train right. See some beautiful sights and watch the world zip past my window as I figuratively flee from the pain and apathy of every day life.

...also I wanna make out with a hot older bearded daddy because I'm feeling FRISKY.

If I was rich, I'd open a store called "F*ck Walmart" and I'd literally just sell one of everything Walmart does, but I'd only charge a penny.

Because the point isn't to buy from me, it's to take advantage of corporation Price Match Guarantees and put them all out of business.

A pan of onion rings, topped with chicken, bacon, cheese, ranch, lettuce, onions, tomatos, and more ranch.

Everyone stfu, I made chicken bacon ranch onion ring nachos!!

Do something fun, whatever goats your float. Then maybe sample one or two things off the fridge, because you deserve a treat!

I got here in time, at the cost of having 2 hours of downtime before the shift starts. Gonna be a very long night... 🫠🫠

Today is the first day of my nursing capstone. I was feeling great, but suddenly I'm terrified. Not of the work. Not of my preceptor. Not even that the other day a visitor threatened staff with a gun.

No, I'm nervous about getting to the security office in time because I don't wanna pay $5 to park.

Embrace the awkward. Most people appreciate genuine interaction, even if it's odd. And if they don't, they don't deserve your presence!

8) Does NO ONE see how magickally ritualistic this whole thing is? Genuinely, if everyone spoke in a different language and the imagery was changed, these people wouldn't be able to distinguish it from a coven.

7) Lady gave a "Glory Sighting" that she beheld a cross in the clouds and that was God saying he was protecting everyone from the storm this weekend. Oh, unrelated, the Pastor had severe flooding and had to flee from his house the other day. Maybe "protecting" means something else to her.

6) These hymns are way too pitchy. Maybe I'm accustomed to monotone orthodox Presbyterian "songs" that get their pizzazz from an former choir director granny screeching the soprano harmony. Odd choices, I could not sing along.

5) During the prayer request time, a woman asked for "wisdom" for our "leaders" and that "our country will find victory." So THAT was a MAGA dog whistle. F*cking disgusting that bitch had the gall to then sing a hymn about the Prince of Peace ending all wars...

4) The Church is dying. At least old school small town Churches are. It was all old people. The anti-thiest in me took a little too much pleasure in that.

3) Pastor correctly informed the congregation that Jesus is the Greek version of the Hebrew name (that I'm not going to attempt to spell, but basically is Joshua).

Josh died for our sins. F*cking Josh.

2) So. Many. White. Jesus's. And oddly feminine? Don't understand the need for so many paintings of Jesus, is nice landscape and abstract art blasphemous or something?

"Observations of Church Service from a Pagan Athiest Who Hasn't Been to Church Since the Pandemic: A Thread"

1) Wow a LOT of sitting and standing. Forgot how much of a knee workout this whole shebacle is.

Lacy, my yellow lab, smiling wide with her black lab puppies cuddled under her. She was only 5 in at this point, she's too tired to beam like this now, so I took the pic while I could.

A large group of black lab puppies suckling on a yellow lab momma. She is pooped, but isn't done just yet.

Up to 9, with a possible 10th on the way! She's exhausted, but a proud and good mom! Puppies were latching at first, but the Energency Vet wasn't too worried as its her first litter. They are suckling now, so all is well.

Take the fall? No way, he's just going to go after her. She wasn't attacking his enemies hard enough; she's officially one of them in his eyes.

He's using the DOJ as his own personal lawyers, he'll be expired before there's a fall for anyone to take.

A zoomed in picture of a yellow lab belly, with four newly born black lab puppies snuggling in to suckle

IT'S HAPPENING!!!