New and Exciting Anxieties Gifted to Me by My Three-Year-Old The time she asked me what I was doing, and I said I was stretching my muscles, and she responded, “You don’t have any muscles. I have BIG muscles. YOU have ...

Good morning, please enjoy my @mcsweeneys.net debut:

www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/new...

“Maralago mafia” is a good one

any introvert's nightmare

MY SON: “Yeah the trailer for the new Mario movie looks kinda terrible.”

ME: “So you still want to see it!”

MY SON: “Of course!”

a man with a beard is making a funny face . ALT: a man with a beard is making a funny face .

But by waiting 5 minutes he made his walk to the store 1 minute shorter.

Might as well give Mina the title now. She belongs on real Jeopardy and is gonna tear through the other contestants.

Tesla paid $1 billion in taxes to China & $0 in federal income taxes to the US. At least 88 highly profitable corporations paid $0 federal income tax last year while bringing in $ billions. Disney, CVS, Palantir, Taco Bell & others are making massive profits, paying executives enormous ⬇️

As awful as the hike in transit prices for World Cup fans is in NJ, Boston and elsewhere is, not sure FIFA is the best messenger to complain about “chilling effects”. This is the non-profit that has hiked World Cup tickets to levels we’ve not seen before and what about the $300 parking passes?

Good news for New Yorkers, bad news for rats: all trash will be in rat-proof bins by the end of 2031.

No more black bags on the sidewalks — it’s time to put a lid on it.

Image uploaded from tweet

🚨 OFFICIAL: Saudi Arabia sack head coach Hervé Renard with immediate effect before World Cup! 👋🏼🇸🇦

Renard had returned for a second spell as Saudi coach at the end of 2024.

This

👏 👏 👏

The ticket prices are too damn high SFGATE columnist Drew Magary says there's more at risk than just money.

Say it with me, and say it loud: THE TICKET PRICES ARE TOO DAMN HIGH www.sfgate.com/sports/artic...

And Hugh Grant once again killing it as a villain.

SEPTA will keep $2.90 fare for World Cup transit rides. Boston is charging $80. NJ Transit, rumored to be charging $100 a ride, will make an announcement on Friday.

News from @inquirer.com colleagues Tom Fitzgerald and @aliyareports.bsky.social:

While Boston's MBTA charges $80 for train tickets at the World Cup and New Jersey Transit might go over $100, here in Philadelphia, SEPTA will keep the standard subway fare of $2.90.

www.inquirer.com/transportati...

You mean all those tax credits didn't create a sustainable industry? Who could've guessed!?

Erika Kirk and JD Vance are drawing like WCW in 2001

President, Extremely Normal Brain-Wise: Pope Weak on Crime, Also I’m Dr. Jesus Christ

A+ headline.

defector.com/president-ex...

I suspect the Pope sounds "woke" to many Christian conservatives because the US is steeped in prosperity theology, where the point of worship is to deliver health and wealth to believers. Thus, "feed the hungry" and "show mercy for the poor" sounds needlessly political and "woke."

Remember when Trump threatened to wipe out a whole civilization? And then backed out of that and talked about forming a deal with Iran? And then dropped that and went to a UFC fight as negotiations fell apart? And then unveiled a triumphal arch and a photo of himself as Jesus?

That was this week.

They should be collecting tchotchkes not tips.

"DoorDash grandma" is just a deeply depressing phrase that we should be so ashamed applies to a person in this country.

William H Macy in closeup, a still from The Cooler

JD Vance wanders the world stage

Hungary election live: Viktor Orbán concedes defeat in Hungarian election after 16 years in power Long-serving prime minister beaten by opposition after early results showed clear lead

Orban concedes defeat. The support of Trump, Vance, Putin, Lavrov, Weidel, Milei, Le Pen, Fico, Babis and many others could not overcome Hungarian anger at a stagnant, corrupt regime

www.theguardian.com/world/live/2...

In Donald Trump’s America, the rich get tax cuts, the well-connected get stock tips, and everybody else makes sacrifices.

The line between math teen and southern frat boy hair is a fine one.

So far, Vance’s foreign policy record is yelling at Zelensky for not thanking Trump enough, campaigning for AfD in Germany and Orban in Hungary, getting rejected by the Pope on his invite to the US, and failing in the Iran negotiations.

pic of Dana White, Rubio, and Trump

Secretary of State Marco Rubio at UFC in Miami tonight as diplomatic negotiations with Iran fail

(Julia Demaree Nikhinson/AFP via Getty)