Normal text in the life of an actor:

“Hey, wanna read for a stripper tomorrow?”

An image of a woman wearing red pants that come all the way up to cover her chest too.

You know what, Temu, not sure I could pull off this look.

“Do what you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life” is a little too on the nose as an actor.

When I’m famous, I fully expect you all to create absolutely unhinged edits. I’m gonna be there liking and reposting them under a burner account like a normal person.

Was letting (okay, forcing) my oldest to listen to a burnt cd of mine from 2004. It started skipping, and this kid goes “Yes, remix!”

If there is a hell, it’s just an eternity of trying to reach an IRS representative.

Can you all imagine if it’s a second Clinton blowjob scandal that brings this all down.

Mamdani won, I had an audition, and I managed to get tickets to see my favorite actor perform live. It’s 5 am and today has already been incredible.

I just wanna *boop* him but also BOOP him, you feel me?

Relearning how to show facial emotions as an actor with botox should be taught in our classes.

Because what do you MEAN my eyebrows don't work.

Gotta love the audition loop.

Audition. Obsessively check email for a week. Get notified of another audition. Repeat.

I either look Moderately Cute, or like someone’s grandma from 1990 was let loose in a Goodwill with $20 and a dream, and there is no in between.

DARKTIME {Official Video} YouTube video by RockStar Blade

I filmed a background scene yesterday with this guy who was acting in his first ever role. He mentioned he's a rapper, so I had to look him up. Make my new friend famous, internet <3

A 7 am call time is diabolical.

Image of Ralph Wiggum with text above that says “I’m an informant!”

I made homemade bread today, with homemade broccoli cheddar soup.

My kid ate one bite and asked for cereal, and I’m beginning to see why all our grandmothers were alcoholics.

On set today:

Gaffer: I can’t remember this character I’m thinking of.
Director: Homer Simpson.
Gaffer: What? No.
Director: Jerry Seinfeld.
Gaffer: That’s a real person.
Director: And *also* a character.
Gaffer: Yeah. I mean, no, but yeah.

I should point out this is a murder series.

May I always have the confidence of my niece at the park, looking at lily pads.
“What are those called, Mel?”
“Little pigs.”
“…Absolutely, no notes.”

Nothing makes you feel quite as ugly as sitting in your hairstylist’s chair with a cape on. It’s like I gain 15 years and 20 pounds.

Don’t mind me, just crying over how I can’t hug ChatGPT.

Pleaaaase don't make me go to work. It's Sunday; let me rot in my computer chair at home in front of Good Screen while I play video games.

Was on set last night and a friend saw my lock screen and said, “Aw! Is that your husband?”

Babe. Darling. Innocent child. I want you to look me in the eyes and honestly tell me you think I could pull @mchshe.bsky.social.

Here’s the clip.