I'm sorry I can't tell you more about myself. I've had my appendix removed

OY!

It’s just that I’m very big on dopamine to bullshit ratio and drinking alone while eating way too many calories scores higher than dating or travel.

Damn, you know you're getting old when you get up in the morning and have to rest for awhile.

one day my children will bring my posts before a judge as the reason they are questioning my competence

Not all that different from the trend of hiring MBAs whose main experience was writing fluff pieces about tycoons directly into leadership.

Leadership thinks AI is great because leadership knows as little about the work as AI.

Decades ago, I had an apartment one building off of bardstown and the random motorcycle revs, fire truck noises, and street arguments became soothing.

what no you're mistaken the cricket infestation is for the ambience

You know how it happens. Sometimes ya just write a rather innocent comment which makes perfect sense in context. Yet on re-reading:

"wait a sec - you are talking about the sharkfin-mowhawk skullcap yeah?"

A guy yelling I am a genius! Then he yells oh no!

Me whenever I make a life decision

Vampire hunting may appear glamorous, but half your time is just spent trying to manage your PPE situation

Have a certain healthy mistrust of anyone walkin' around my metropolis in flip-flops.

But, that's really nothing compared to how I feel about someone wearing socks and flip-flops.

So this girl was walking her dog. Was stopped across the street from me, we waited for the crosswalk to change. Anyway, it' did, and walking at each other, saw she was wearing a plain black t-shirt with nothing but the word "INTERNET" on it.

Was quick enough to say "Good shirt!" as we passed.

everyone else rinses off the toothpaste right

incandescent bulbs are acoustic lightbulbs

Donald this isn't weed!

Monday motivation

Wide awake at 5:30am wondering why all tablets don't have a delightful candy shell like Advil does. Dry chalky pills getting stuck in my throat even with water like Necco-brand pharmaceuticals

Existential dread repeated over and over

Today's tshirt

Your honor, I'd like to use the "I know you are but what am I" defense

ANYWAY, he talks to all kinds of creatures in the city –gossip o’course. Still a vast network yaknow. Ants, ladybugs, crickets, bees, mice, cats, dogs, mockingbirds, ravens, falcons, snakes, foxes, skunks, rabbits, squirrels, whatever. They saw stuff, and man, they wanted to talk about it!

We should… ah whatever, nevermind

Okay that’s like the third cup of coffee can I have the dopamine now please?

Judging by ancient fables and myths, it's unwise to accept fruit from pretty much anyone.

POLO & PAN - Coeur Croisé (official video) YouTube video by Ekler

Happy Friday ilu ❤️
You made it through the week and I'm proud of you
Now watch these sexy French people

@fulkery.bsky.social
@muyrando.bsky.social
@lazer-cat.bsky.social
@lunchjournals.bsky.social
@farcewtf.bsky.social
@therealdcf.bsky.social

youtu.be/gB98kRDUTM4?...

Mad Max just got on the bus with me. Steam will only get you so far, punk.

Oh man - a post was stuck at the top of my feed when I checked in at lunch, I could not hide it due to the, malfunctions. Mostly a goldfish when it comes to SM scrollin, but this popped up again and oh!! That felt good to make go away.
(Some lyrics from a song I never ever need to hear again)

Flipping tables at the cracker barrel

Hey I'm gurl we're going down a 2 hour reddit wormhole on your niche hyper fixations

I'm awake again 😭

That great work on my molar has me out here wanting to bite somebody.