Me, a straight guy in this thread:

Reactionaries: "LGBTQIA+ has too many letters in it!"
Hugo: "Fine, how about 'queer' then?"
Reactionaries:

And dem tiddies didn't disappear in 2023 either

Everybody THINKS they can make a better chocolate bar, until a hefty German kid gets stuck in the chocolate pipe

They're thoughtmaxxing

Look, having awagga—my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Awagga at MIT; good genes, very good awagga, OK, explained that to me many, many years ago, I would have said it’s all in the awagga; fellas—but the awagga are great negotiators let me tell you, yooj awagga

Then you get: "Craig was last seen having a shouting match in the street with his drug dealer, who after Craig's subsequent disappearance refused a polygraph, changed his name and fled the country. Where could Craig be???? It's truly one of the great mysteries of our age."

Not with that attitude you don't

Us: o hey you're back early

Bea: Grandma's house is haunted

Us: what?

Bea: *cocks pistol and heads back out* Grandma's house is haunted

GET EM, JAMES!

I believe in you

Also Grandpa Neumann:

I think it's because this kind of dress is cut for women, who have relatively thin arms and shoulders, but bros I'm telling you: if you squeeze your man-body in there your arms and shoulders will look Huge

Crumchwrap

The OG YA dystopia!

That was a close one, you almost messed up that house

I've been trying to find a reaction image for this since it went up but tell me there's not a kung fu movie or anime or something where the novice spars with the master and unexpectedly gets a good hit in! That's what I want to put here. Cannot find it to save my life

The Meryxtape

Can't wait go develop those little black wiggly things in the corners of my mouth

Taste the gree-zza and report back