this is why you can take your “the biden administration was actually a success” posts and shove them directly up your ass

oops you misspelled trump posted snuff and promised mass pardons but democrats in congress are still more focused on protecting aipac than doing literally anything about it.

tired of being alive but paid too much into life insurance to do anything about it

it is important to remember in these difficult times that every single republican is an irredeemable asshole. once again, there are no exceptions.

audience when a young amateur standup tries to build confidence at a free open mic night: YOU SUCK KILL YOURSELF!!

audience when a white house official barfs crazy theocratic nonsense about a vanity war with a smarmy grin on his stupid face: [respectful nodding]

lol back in college we just called being suddenly and mysteriously transported to a waffle house by the hand of god getting blackout drunk.

me: [eating small animals i pulled out of a bear] hey wtf these aren’t crackers

artemis ii crew now being wheeled into position in front of ralph kramden

i am happy haha april fools i don’t even know what that is

here’s an idea how about instead of delta suspending specialty services for members of congress until they fund the tsa everyone suspends specialty services for members of congress everywhere until forever

would cry for help but honestly what’s the point

it’s important to be reminded that everyone is terrible and life is awful because sometimes i start to forget.

ring sensor advertisement with the boldly threatening and objectively stupid tagline “Security Unleashed”

hm if only there were a real world analogy for why leashes are actually good things for security to have

still haven’t seen any curlers slide that big stone into the opposing team and knock em all down like a bunch of bowling pins is this the height of competitive sports or what.

look i get that olympic athletes have to maintain weird diets but i just don’t think they should eat their medals.

just spent an hour clumsily hacking at a big pile of ice with a hatchet. 5 stars cannot recommend enough.

yes, “used to”

i hope you all feel pretty bad about yourselves making pam body upset like that. you’re all just a bunch of meanies is what you are. big ol’ meanies.

JD Vance should be booed everywhere he goes for the rest of his life.

ghoulish statements aside, really weird choice to hold a press conference while standing on a teeter-totter.

can’t believe that guy risked his life climbing the taipei tower when he could have just stood in the general vicinity of ice officers.

hey jokes about air force one are not cool. don’t give us hope.

boy nothing says you deserve the nobel peace prize more than threatening war if you don’t get it amirite folks haha we have fun here.

who can really say who was right and who was wrong

i dunno if a nobel peace prize winner tried to give me their medal i would say oh no thank you i did not earn that it would be very very sad and pathetic for me to accept it as if i deserved it but hey i guess that’s just me.

huge dropped ball for media that no reporters have pulled a “pedophile protector says what” at a press conference because you know leavitt would fall for it.

Star Tribune identifies ICE agent who fatally shot woman in Minneapolis Jonathan Ross was dragged in a separate incident last year by a fleeing driver, according to court records.

The murderer’s name is Jonathan Ross. www.startribune.com/ice-agent-wh...

This is what people on Fox are like. People watch Fox because they like this.

counterpoint….now?