This is badass & I need to make one now

Love love love

Kid watched his first Werner Herzog film today. He is mystified.

I think of that baby girl often lately, when trying to wrap my mind around the loss of my niece, bc that experience was a profoundly spiritual one for me. Since then I’ve lost many friends & some students, all younger than we imagine they should have been. There is no satisfying reason. It just is.

What it taught me (as someone who was already adultified by more immediate & personal trauma at that point) is that suffering is a universal & senseless experience. That regardless of your faith or knowledge, there are things in this world that are beyond comprehension for the human heart.

When I was around 12yrs old, my mom did something very controversial (which I’m sharing not to open abstract debate, but as my lived experience) by bringing me to the funeral of our family friend’s infant, who was born w severe heart defects. I was mentally prepared & distanced enough.

Traveling thru this dark time, I’m glad my mom exposed me to many different faiths, cultures, & traditions when I was a kid—especially when it came to death & mourning. Nothing breaks you like the death of a child you love, but I’m glad it is not my first time confronting profound mystery.

My first experience with it was when my son was only 5 months old & my Nonno passed away, & he was giving everyone such big hugs & smiles.

Grieving as a parent of a young kid is such a bizarre experience bc one second you’re alone in your room crying & the next you’re laughing hysterically bc your son has made up a new song about butts.

First day in a week or more that I’ve been able to crochet without my heart thinking I’m doing intense cardio & I just wasted it on a hexi cardi panel that was done wrong 3 rows in & had to be frogged & why is this happening to me (it’s the brain fog)

The Art of Crocheting : Free Download, Borrow, and Streaming : Internet Archive 143 p

The Art of Crocheting - 1891

It's rather funny that the book opens by referring to crochet as a "pastime," considering that we often still more or less refer to it that way well over a century later.

archive.org/details/arto...

Maybe. I was projecting a bit on that one bc it’s such a work trope. Also maybe personal experience. Sore spot.

Don’t make me pull a Laura Mulvey about Mel & Langdon cuz I swear to God it’s like no one realized she existed until Langdon started to “see” her

Exactly! Plus I hate the idea that Mel must be in love with him just bc he’s good looking & nice to her like hello we are way past that She’s All That bull, weird girls can go out and get it for themselves if they want to

They can be friends & Mel can go get some hot man candy somewhere else maybe the karaoke place MAYBE SHE’S GAY we don’t even know yet ok let my girl LIVE

I need the internet to stop shipping Mel & Langdon. Have we learned nothing from Meredith & Karev? From Peggy & Don? Hell, from Don & Joan??

I need that messy middle aged potentially impending divorcee man to leave my girl alone SHE IS TOO GOOD FOR HIM even if he is nice to her & went to therapy.

I also used it today to help show my son how I determine when I can or can’t do something. He finds it hard to understand why some days I’m able to do something but the next day I’m not, even if I don’t try to do it first to see how I feel. But we had a good discussion this morning & he’s getting it

Handmade crochet beanie hat with matching scarf - brand new on eBid United Kingdom | 227874266 Handmade crochet beanie hat with matching scarf - brand new Listing in the Hats,Women's Accessories,Clothes, Shoes, Accessories Category on eBid United Kingdom | 227874266

This funky handmade crochet scarf & matching beanie hat is 25% off for the next 24hrs.
Proceeds go to sending out parcels of other handmade items (scarves & hats) to homeless outreach projects around the UK.
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Yeah, I get if for Xmas each year from my spouse & for me it’s useful bc I’m not great at pacing but really good at gaslighting myself. It’s also been helpful while I’m going through my legal action w insurance.

The great thing about the Visible app & wearable is that it uses data to trace a clear pattern that accurately describes the experience of living with post-exertion symptom exacerbation. The bad thing is that it makes it undeniable so I have to try to live within restrictions that feel impossible.

But hey I’m more educated than anyone else in my family before or since so 👍

I can’t say I fully regret turning down the job but I will say I regret not taking the money I made at the bank & using it to buy a townhouse in 2008 that is now worth 5x as much as I would have paid for it 😭

If I’d taken that job in 2007 I’d probably not gotten long covid & would be making six figures by now but que sera sera follow your passion amiright

My dumb ass was offered a good permanent bank job w a great starting salary the next year on only a 3yr degree but I turned it down bc I wanted to be a teacher & then there was a recession the year after that where the same place slashed my pay since I was just an FT contract & they could.

This May will mark 20 years since I started my first proper full time adult job. I’d sleep over at my degenerate friends’ places in the annex & slip out while they slept bc they were still doing gig work & prepping for grad school & I’d roll up on Bay St on 4hrs sleep praying for financial freedom.

I got back into crochet by playing with rainbow loom kit someone gave my son when he was still too little to use it on his own. I needed a screen-free distraction that helped keep my hands moving & calmed my nerves, & a few years later I’m crocheting for the fam & learning to knit!

I truly believe we live in one of the most beautiful & interesting places in the world but wow do we ever pay for it!

One of the things that sucks about being an artist or crafter is knowing that if only you could make money doing your work you would turn around & spend that on other artists & craftspeople & that this sort of utopia is totally possible but just out of reach

I’ve been looking for ways to pretty up my bedroom since we moved not long ago & my mission at the new place is to make the upstairs as enjoyable as possible for days when I’m trapped up here & unable to leave my room / the second floor. These would be great for my window & for my patio door!

Love this! Exactly the type of thing I’ve been looking for. Added the pattern & shop to my Etsy wish list 🥰