Just realized how much tattoos cost. Not very punk.

It’s the first of the month

I’m doing Woodward this summer

I’m up

Marinara on my yoga clothes

Please tell me what a primary inbox is

Only a matter of time before I figure out who JellyRole is

Egg prices. Wow. You’d think it was tamago

Truth social. More like Deez Nuts

I’m DOING my taxes
but I’m GETTING a shingle

My eBay seller rating is 🔥

Anyone else using ChatGPT to write customer complaint emails?

It’s the first of the month

Im
Up

I’m up

Gutted

What’s up with feel-good kids movies having dumb waiters

Bedtime for babies

I own more vacuums than I do butter knives

Selling my kidneys on fb marketplace

Tonight I went to Trader Joe’s and bought some chili. The cashier asked if I “wanted a spoon”!! I was almost offended then realized I had my Halliburton jacket on.

Company is Latin for With Bread

I’m at a point in my life where I want to start breaking into cars

I’m up

Sitting here watching a Skyrizi commercial thinking “maybe I am an artist”

Napped

I’m up