lady: Please stop singing Backstreet Boys fella: Tell me why

Might want to teach it how to wield something more than a Glock for these types. 🤣

chat just wants me bald ☹️

#vtuber #vtuberen

a person is holding an egg in their hand in front of a glass of orange juice ALT: a person is holding an egg in their hand in front of a glass of orange juice

Egg'g

Actually, since it's so much older and tied to Facebook, we just call it instagrampa.

they got doo doo in the pee pee port and it took down the whole app

bluesky is actually paying homage to an ancient internet tradition known as "signing off." it is a lost art, but people would "disconnect" and maybe return to the family computer after finishing dinner and homework

Jeraldthemew, I beg your finest pardon

Instructions unclear, pronouncing Yosemite like Vegemite

Three panel comic. Panel 1: scene from the movie Aliens; Ripley is in a mech suit and delivers her iconic line: “get away from her, you bitch!” Panel 2: the xenomorph queen lunges at Ripley in the robotic suit and they engage in a fight. Panel 3: later, the xenomorph queen is standing in the shower, mid wash. She says, “‘it takes one to know one, honey.’ That’s what I should have said.”

Don't need to go to Coachella. I can just blast different songs simultaneously from every room in my house and pretend I have no bathrooms.

Due to economic conditions brought on by Jerry being verified, it has been shortened to "Ms. Pelling" to cut down on ink and data storage costs.

"If any of you in any way hate homosexuals, people of different color, or women, please do this one favor for us - leave us the f**k alone! Don't come to our shows and don't buy our records." - Kurt Cobain The Advocate, 1995

Mood, every single day.

there’s no guillotine emoji what’s that all about

Autocorrect... you piece i'd shit liar.

It's not delivery, it's bibinos!

a screenshot with: - the bluesky logo - the header "Join the conversation" - a "Create account" button - a "Pledge fealty to Jerry" button - a dropdown for language that has "English" selected

wow i'm incredibly honored

got in the car and apple bottom jeans was playing on the radio. "you're listening to 93.3 FM, millennial retirement home radio"

hearing rumors that a second blue check is possible. they're like michelin stars

when morpheus was like you can take the red pill or the blue pill, he was actually just talking about nyquil and dayquil. not many people know this

A bumber sticker on a car that says honk if you love snoopy or are insane

*my dead body slumped over the steering wheel, laying on the horn*

*sigh* Who do I return this damn thing to when I end up having to scoop it from my cat's litterbox?

2FA stands for 2 Falafels, Alright. not many people know this

Screenshot of Elmo next to his pet's fishbowl in Elmo's World. The subtitles say "We. Dorothy's been thinking abou and down to what’s her daughter."

four birds in a cartoon from Sesame Street, with the caption reading "Oh, shit"

Another Sesame Street cartoon saying "Oh shit"

Screenshot of Big Bird in Hooper’s Store with live human Alan and a flying red bird. The subtitles read: "Time for the birth of terror. Me"

Do not watch Sesame Street on Tubi with the subtitles on 😭. I swear, I didn't edit or add anything. Is it hilarious? Yes, but also, they need to fix this immediately. Absolutely incomprehensible and bad

Ah, the old unleaded grapes.

I gotta use all my fucks in my daily vocabulary that way people don't start to assume I have extra left over to give. 👍

To all who celebrate

Doggy

A McDonald’s where the sign has been reduced to McDo.

There is no McTry.

at least it's friday