Asking subject organisms in biological studies if they consent to take part in experiments can reduce selection bias.

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2026/plantco...

Bananas Have Peyronie’s Disease: Definitive Clinical Evidence That Nature Is Trolling Us

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2026/penisba...

Quantitative Evidence for the “Shit In, Shit Out” Hypothesis in Large Language Models

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/s/SISO-GS2.pdf

The Total Synthesis of (+)-stupidity and the Consequences Thereof

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/s/Stupidity....

Here’s the link: www.etsy.com/au/shop/Imma...

We’ve nearly been going for five years now, which by all rights should never have happened. As always, thanks are due to our authors, our patron supporters, our artists, and our readers. This cavalcade of ridiculousness is all your fault.

Volume 5 is here everyone! The PDF will be online soon, but the hardcopies are on the Etsy store for everyone who wants one. It’s 96 pages of high-impact, high-novelty, beer-reviewed bullshit, and 70% of the articles were written by you.

Fronds with benefits: how the 5G network gives plants wood.

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2026/frondsw...

This week’s paper investigates a new family structure in response to declining birth rates, with IPA as a defining feature.

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2025/ipa

On the merits of pickling cucumbers with titanium tetrachloride.

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/s/Pickles.pdf

“anti-YAPPERS”: A Novel Conversational Framework for Detecting Nonsense

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2025/yappers

And finally, entry 9: fur-lined lab gloves. Because four of the entries were from us, everyone who submitted an ad wins a hardcopy! Our thanks to the submitters, Volume 5 will be on sale soon.

Entry 8: A new line of Black 6 lab mice. Entries have now closed for our ad competition.

Making Dinosaur Juice from Simple Saccharides: Total Synthesis of 𝜶-D-tolupyranose

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2025/sugar

Entry 7: photochemistry in the blink of an eye.

Entry 6: a new use for used chromatography silica.

Entry 5: An essential tool for the laboratory ornithologist.

How Big Can The Periodic Table Get Before Students Call Bullshit?

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/s/Longest-Pe...

Entry 4: The Wine Schlenk.

We need some more entries in the ad-competition folks, 75% of the ads so far were made by the editor. New deadline for submissions is the 10th of January.

Here are the guidelines: www.reddit.com/r/Immaterial...

Those Fuckers Were Making It Up This Whole Time: An Exposé of “Electrochemistry"

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2025/electro...

Entry 3: A dating app for chemists

Solving the Riemann Hypothesis via My Spam Folder

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2025/riemann

Entry 2 in the ad competition: the annual SciHub plug.

Here’s the first entry in our spoof-ad competition: The McSolvent Fountain.

A paper on the best strategies to deal with malign spirits in a molecular biology setting.

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2025/pcr-dem...

The 2025 spoof-ad competition is now open! The best five entries win hardcopies of the journal, submissions close January 5th. See the fourth image for details.

Towards an Exact Formula for Superpermutation Length: Revisiting the Haruhi Problem

PDF: www.immaterialscience.org/2025/haruhi