hermetic order of the goldie hawn

I’m just, an Annoying Uncle™️ 😎

but maybe that’s a good parenting lesson opportunity for her? I donno, I’m not a parent

but I think they’d hit my sister with them

I want to make my niece and nephews swords

It’s Adam and Eve, not Brooks and Dunn

I won a game :)

I’m pixelated in real life

Secrets of Strixhaven mystical archive Force of Will, straight from the booster pack. crying, shaking, etc

guess this is just my mtg thread now. look at the card I just pulled from a booster pack holy shit 😭

sex seen

A horse saved is a horse earned.

yes I posted this same thing on twitter like 6 years ago, so what, I think about it every time I go to this place and see this thing

a soap dispenser or air freshener (can’t remember, I took this pic a couple weeks ago) in a restaurant bathroom that says “matthew squeak’s facility hygiene,” and I’m pretending the apostrophe doesn’t exist so it sounds like I, matthew, regularly squeak, which I do

you’re damn right I do

the standing diddle hits different for sure

gotta get in the shower 😇 so I can go to bed 😌 so I can go to work 😔 so I can go to magic night 😎

relatable lol

I know what you mean though, it’s up there with gasoline as scents I know I shouldn’t like but do anyway

I hope someone cosplays sexy rocky from project hail mary

I mean you COULD (please don’t!)

tell them to *ahem* ~baguetteaboutit~

I hope he sees this. make less weird thumbnails!!

an innovative technique, I’m impressed

ahh she’s so cool, I love ultra so much

hahahaha

like I said,

natalie portman
natalie harborman
natalie coveman
natalie bayman
natalie gulfman

I would visit these places

lol

bald guy (Rex something I think, a youtube woodworker) making a suggestive face next to the text “it slides RIGHT in” 😳

I hate woodworking youtubers

corn on the cob wise