Kidz Bop version of Closer be like “I want to pet you like an animal”

Browning’s The Grammarian’s Funeral but it’s about influencer culture

Eat da spaghetti eat da meatballs eat da bwoccoli don’t be a vibe kill

I am not to be trusted around husbands or children

It’s called a non traditional student. And you have such a penchant for pontificating on subjects outside your areas of experience or expertise I think you could really shine

I think you should go to law school

*prodigy voice* I’m the problem solver, eager problem solver … hey hey hey

Trying to spend as much money as possible before guilt and depression set back in #Ifeelsofree

lmao not you being a vibe kill I literally said don’t be

To say nothing of how good it has been to Madonna and by the transitive property, me

Starting to fear that astrology is real considering how happy, productive and thriving I’ve been since Friday

Bad girl bed by 9

Corn cob pipe vape

the concept of a big guy like me cracking open a cold one

High key feeling like a Ferragamo wallet that got run over by a Subaru

Trent Reznor pls lemme suck it just for a minute

Watching Addison Rae at Coachella if I were straight I’d def have a boner rn

Anyone got any tips for raising my testosterone levels while also making me a better business owner?

God are people still mixing us up and you had to explain my oeuvre again?

Installed my next gen nest thermostat I bought back in October finally. Took all of 15 minutes

I don’t eat an entire birthday cake for lunch

Need Bring Your Love to droppppppp

The concept of a woman with a second family

Seven planets lined up in Aeries you know what that means

It’s the new moon of Taurus

Geena Davis is wearing one of Madonna’s grills

🎶 heartbreak is one thing, my pussy’s another 🎶

And I said get Paul Toilet on the phone immediately

I really don’t think there’s a person I care for less than Dan Levy