This one does go above and beyond

Wait, did they just remix the first half again to fill out the second half? Did no one tell them that Americans have no attention span?

I have to wonder what kind of bad agent/publicist advice brings about such social media posts. Seems like the project is to steamroll momentum into some kind of viral "win" that leads to more publicity, but ... does that even work anymore?

Uh I think I forgot to tell you guys that I'll be slingin' sauce at the Boston Sauce Party on May 2 at Trillium Brewing in Canton with a buncha burly dudes who like me so don't start nuthin'. Come by if you're area-adjacent! But don't bring books to sign, they'll just get stained.

me at 38: oh i love being fancy and reading to new audiences
me at 56: oh right making your friends laugh is the whole effing point, i have wasted so much tiiiime

that being said it's been a while since "the bill" was just me and a few close buds, and by a while I mean 20 years, and I think that's key to the enjoyment

I read something really raw last night mostly for my friends and a select group of rando audience members and gawddam if I'm not back to believing that writing is the very best of what life has to offer

Don't bring a knife to a gunfight. Bring a knife to a vault containing many wheels of cheese in a brutalized postapocalyptic society where knives are only a legend. You are now Knifebringer, Divider of the Cheese. Raise your knife and rule the clans.

gonna absolutely annihilate this baby shower when I whip out my salted earl grey rice krispie treats

oh shit, the pope used to be hot ???!?!?!!? dang am i automatically Catholic now ???!?!?!!!?

But I am now thinking about how we need to develop new parameters for talking about clean eating. I think it's weird to advocate for a plant-based diet but waste 10-25 milliliters of water with every business decision you make. I am completely alone on this issue in food school, however.

So then I did say something, I said, "I know what I need. I need someone to chop vegetables for me." Which ended the conversation.

When I didn't say anything she started extolling the virtues of Chat GPT, and went on a long monologue about how you just plug in all your information and all your recipes and all you earnings and spending data and then you can ask it what you need and it just tells you.

We had a speaker in food school the other day who started a vegan confection company (which ok is not that hard to pull off) but did it by herself and did all aspects of it for many years like I'm doing so I ask her advice about when and how she found employees and she goes "ask Chat GPT."

I feel like I should commemorate this epic shitshow of a day on this website but i have just realized my kitchen is overrun with ants

If you are a novelist in the Hudson Valley with nothing to do on Saturday, whyncha lemme know?

CHEEP. | TinkertownProvisions Delicious. Accessible. Affordable. Like the hot sauce you grew up with and pretend now to have grown out of (except for the bottle you keep in the fridge for late-night pizzas), CHEEP is the high-qual...

Released a new sauce today that sold through in an hour, I think people like it. It's CHEEP: www.tinkertownprovisions.com/product-page...

Guess what, I set up 3 interviews from these 23 resumes plus I got two more in and only one applicant showed up! And she's thinking about leaving her tenure-track professorship to come make hot sauce with me! I can't even describe how insane all of this is, nor I am sure do I need to.

update re: my feelings about The Comeback: I am *fascinated* by it to the point of near-obsession, but I do not actually like it

This indeed was the topic that destroyed the vibe at my birthday party the other night (no regrets tho)

a well-deserved one, too

Only signing on today to say that having regular and merely literary-adjacent celebrities judge your book awards is BAD and I HATE IT and I'm sure it brings in money but it still SUCKS FOR BOOKS

no no, you appear to be correct, altho it is a fund that rewards a couple left-wingers too, for whatever reason

Uh oh, what did I miss?

yes. the ai clearly recognizes food related words but cannot articulate in more detail.

Ivy-league food school getting very confusing. Guy named Martin Broccoli is currently advising me on meat processing and another dude named Mark Scoville is helping me sort out grains.

wow The Comeback is really harrowing

I totally get it's hard to be a person these days, but I have 23 resumes on my desk right now and not a single one shows the slightest bit of interest or effort.

I don't think the kids are all right, you guys.

Plus: You no longer need to have a single requested skill to apply for a job. You're young, you'll figure it out!

Learning a lot about Gen Z while trying to hire one to work at my hot-sauce factory. One thing: no cover letters! Another: "NEED JOB" is now a skill! Interview appointments are flexible, and you can just demand one for whenever you would like, or show up a week early expecting to be interviewed!