Those top two are unassailable. I’m a big New Adventures in Hi-Fi fan.

Buddy, same!

I’m gonna buy a ticket just so halfway through I can blurt out “More like Masturbators of the Universe!”

Paint

What is a crap?

The release schedule for Batman this fall is UNHINGED

Batman (vol. 4) #1 — Sept 3
Batman (vol. 3) #162 — Sept 17
Batman (vol. 4) #2 — Oct 1
Batman (vol. 3) #163 — Oct 29

What is Spider-Man?

Ugh, tell me about it

Who is someone so ugly she frightens kids worse than a popular series of youth horror literature?

—Paul Dini, circa 1992

What is Warsaw?

UPDATE: It’s in the deleted scenes. The Kize has still never been wrong about anything!

Me today, in all sincerity: “Wow, crazy how out of all the characters in Scott Pilgrim, Knives Chau is the one whose butt they showed!”

Everyone in my Discord: “Kize…that never happened.”

Best horse meat in town!

It’s just really sad how JFK never got to see X-Men comics get good.

Between working at home, loving the tablet reading experience, and the Marvel, DC, and library apps, buying physical comics every week makes little sense to me any more.

It was a good 25 year run, but today marked the final weekly trip to the comic shop for your old buddy Kize.

The president should have to give a press conference in costume on Halloween.

There’s a unique type of guilt that sets in when your dumb BS joke answer to a serious AskReddit gets 12,000 upvotes.

So far, Tom King’s Wonder Woman really seems like the comic for everyone. For liberals, there’s the commentary on American xenophobia and sexism, but for conservatives, there’s proof that the United States is actually ruled by a secret unelected king.

I often think about the Christian retreat I went to in college, where the worship band opened by playing Amazing Grace to the tune of Smells Like Teen Spirit and then immediately chastised us all, saying, “Worship us! That’s what you do with all those bands you listen to, isn’t it??”

If fans of other sports read comics the way pro wrestling fans do, there’d be a football scene and we’d all be like, “Yeahhh boiii, that’s a cover 2 defense!”

brb, divorcing and remarrying my wife right now

Dick Butkus’s ghost is having a heck of a game tonight.

Who do you think they should cast as the next Pee-Wee Herman?

Exit light
Enter night
Take my hand
This comic’s by Neil Gaiman

I was born in 1982, but a stash of my mom’s late brother’s comics were kept at my grandparents’ house, including lots of Lee/Kirby X-Men. I eventually made it back to #1, but this is the first one I actually read.

Barbenheimer doesn’t hold a candle to the fall and rise of 20th Century Japan I just experienced with Oppenmario.

Oh man, remember Planetary?

Leaving a seductive gift on the bed for my wife