a 3-headed, obese cerberus lady casts the news about a local pizzeria. Behind her with a comically large pizza cutter: Emmy, the sheep and owner of said local pizzeria, carves up an enormously large pizza, sprawled across a great aluminum dish upon the pavement. Citizens look with wonder as she invitingly divvies up the pizza under a broad blue sky in a village's downtown brick, historic district.
Tabrienna brings the big scoop (or slice, in this case) on Emmy's freshly baked, record-shattering pizza! This'll surely bring in a new wave of HUGE customers, if Tab doesn't eat it all when the cameras go offline~ For @tabrienna.bsky.social!
Thank y'all so much for hiring me~ 🐶🐶🐶