Which is still 100% more savvy than the yahoos running around the president’s liquor cabinet, ruining it for the rest of us.

a man in a suit and tie is sitting at a desk and making a funny face . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is sitting at a desk and making a funny face .

Helping the kindergartners today learn about seed germination, and one student countered that plants need soil to grow, “My dad uses *hypondrics* and his pwants only need water.” 🤭🤣 ohreally?!

Heck yeah! That’s pretty awesome - and definitely a cool full circle moment. Congrats👍

“Cocaine Bear Eats Cocaine Salmon” last seen driving stolen RV through Yellowstone at high rate of speed.

Photo of farmer in a tractor looking behind him as a pilot ejects horizontally out of a plane about to nosedive vertically into the ground.

Anytime this shows up in my memories I have to share this absolutely *amazing* photograph of an English Electric Lightning F1 pilot, ejecting during a failed flight demo, taken in September of 1962. The timing and luck of both pilot & photographer is off the charts! fearoflanding.com/photography/...

I feel like our therapists are *not* doing okay these days.

Photo of two geese and their 8 babies walking along a gravel path by a lake.

Looks like we weren’t the only ones out for a walk around the lake tonight! Aww. I love the little fuzzy baby burbs…even if their parents are total a$$holes 🤣.

When I’m traveling for fun, or at least not in a rush for work, there’s something I kinda love about people watching at an airport. I can get lost in my head just watching the crowds and enjoying a preflight beverage.

At least Trey tickets go on sale in ~2hrs. (I think)

because if you wanna be a member of the scuba squad , you have to be smart .. ALT: because if you wanna be a member of the scuba squad , you have to be smart ..

Looks like I found their “inspiration”.

So sorry man. Hugs to you and your family. First your mom in the hospital, now your wife’s dad? Ugh 😩. Sending the good vibes to you all. ❤️‍🩹

Person in ninja outfit carrying multiple swords and a sign that says “Ninja Training Camp”. Child also appears to be stuck in a tree and is wearing horse riding boots. Man is helping another fallen child on the grass - who has dropped a baseball glove.

My friend Jeff (@youtah.bsky.social) is letting me share this with you all. Fifteen years ago he took what can only be described as one of the greatest photos of all time, and I’m inclined to agree. This belongs in a museum, or at least among the annals of internet lore. The longer you look. Enjoy.🤣

“The fridge hasn’t magically refilled itself with new food in the last 10 minutes, dude. Close the door!!!” - me, yesterday to my 9yo. Lol.

They hit the craps table apparently on Thursday afternoon, won big, and went on a full on two-day Fear and Loathing bender. Housekeeping found ‘em twitching in a service elevator late last night, muttering something about Elvis and a rhombus?!

My wife used to tell me her classroom up at West High tended to smell like gym socks, BO, and Axe spray.🤭

But she ALWAYS had extra toiletries, tampons/pads and lots of snacks on hand for her kiddos. Some of her students only got a chance to shower in gym class/PE. She wholly loved them. Full stop.

Sorry my friend. Sending much love to you, your mom, and your family. Hoping for a full and speedy recovery for her ❤️‍🩹

1:30am for me over here! 😂🤷🏻‍♂️

Boy riding a bike on a neighborhood bike path trail. Sun setting in front of him.

Good way to end the week; riding off into the sunset. Temps were a bit brisk, but the sun felt good on the face. Everything feels less heavy when I’m outside with my boy…

I personally felt different after I learned to hunt (for food); it tapped into something in my brain. Like I was participating in something almost instinctual…made me grateful and appreciative for the food I eat regularly, especially meat. I do NOT get the anthropocentric mindset of trophy hunting.

Any idea who might be live-skeeting/tweeting/threading the set list tonight? Normally @phish.com does it, but they were noticeably absent last night. I’m not live-streaming it, but would still love to see the callouts in real time.

I have so many questions: How are they finding the drones?! And are those shotguns they’re using?! And how do they even manage to keep aloft with those giant cajones they must be carrying?

Ugh. * A Red Bull, a smoothie, and some protein beforehand…

A Red Bull meat smoothie could work too I suppose. But like, ew. That’s some RFK jr nonsense.

Fridays are hard on my brain.

I’m thinking a Red Bull smoothie and plenty of meat.

Interstellar Rift!

Nuthin on the other socials either. 🤷🏻‍♂️

Any idea why @phish.com isn’t live-skeeting the set list tonight? That’s a first in a long time.

Duck This Snow™ update for South Jordan, Utah: April 16, 2026
<quack quack muttering…quack> “…I hate this &#$?&! snow. Where’d the lake go?!”