a man in a suit and sunglasses is throwing money in the air and saying yeah baby . ALT: a man in a suit and sunglasses is throwing money in the air and saying yeah baby .

Because they are all guilty of insider trading.

a house on stilts with a top hat on it ALT: a house on stilts with a top hat on it

“Just like a bank, I told my broker to ignore my margin calls because the market is temporarily distressed. He said, ‘Sir… this is a Fidelity account, not FASB 157.’”

Humanity: “We’re drowning in plastic!”
Also humanity: “What if we melted it into a castle so we can watch the world burn in comfort?”

If someone invented a giant hot‑mold machine, we could melt all our plastic trash into bricks and build ourselves a cheerful little LEGO mansion. Then we could stand on the balcony, waving proudly, as the planet wheezes its last — a perfect monument to how deeply we misunderstand “solutions.”

a lego man is holding a stack of green 100 dollar bills ALT: a lego man is holding a stack of green 100 dollar bills

If someone invented a hot mold you could melt all the plastic trash you throw away and build yourself a LEGO mansion so you cheer from the castle walls as our planet dies.

It won’t pause.
It won’t question.
It won’t stop, ever, because it was never built to know what’s real.
Only what comes next.”**

No grammar checking.
No fact checking.
No ‘is this scientifically possible.’
It does not think about that.

It just absorbs the noise and amplifies it — relentless — fertilizing every bedtime story with black‑cow nonsense until the fables swell into something bigger than the truth ever was.

It doesn’t think.
It predicts.
A syntax machine.
A word‑guesser.
A calculating compiler of whatever you shovel into it.

Unstoppable (Sia) Music Video | Sarah Connor Tribute YouTube video by Homer Smith

**“You open a webpage full of fairy tales and industrial‑grade nonsense.
And the AI… it doesn’t know truth.
It doesn’t check.
It doesn’t ask if any of it is real, or possible, or even sane.

a man wearing headphones and an orange shirt is looking at something ALT: a man wearing headphones and an orange shirt is looking at something

“Being left alone to take your cognitive test with nothing but your smartphone and a Secret Service team outside the door doesn’t seem fair. Honestly, it should be open‑book.”

Friendly Rivalry (선의의 경쟁)| Official Trailer | English Sub | 213 P&M YouTube video by 213 Pictures & Media (formerly 815 Pictures)

“You fired six tutors this year. What are you going to do, hire another one?”
“What we really need is someone to take the test for him.”
“Like ChatGTP?”
“No, that hasn’t even been invented yet.”

And when things don’t go great, the algorithm just quietly updates itself while everyone points at the influencer and says, “See? That’s why we still need people in charge.”

It turns out the future doesn’t get rid of the fall guy.
It just gives them better lighting and a sponsorship deal.

So instead, society keeps electing “reality influencers” — charismatic humans whose main job is to stand in front of the algorithm, smile confidently, and say things like, “Everything is going great!”

In the near future, voting gets weird.
People are asked to choose which new version of ChatGTP should run the giant algorithm behind the curtain. But nobody wants to admit they don’t understand the release notes.

George Ezra - Blame It on Me (Official Video) YouTube video by GeorgeEzraVEVO

In the near future it will be hard to get people to vote for a new version of ChatGPT to run things like the algorithm behind the curtain so reality influencers will still be needed as candidates to be symbols of leadership and to act like fall guys when things go wrong.

And the cabinet‑bound AI from Poor AI whispers through the keyhole:

“If they ask me to rhyme ‘missile silo’ with ‘my ex Milo’ one more time, I swear…”

Meanwhile PETAI is outside the bunker chanting:

“No more Seuss abuse
Let the poor bots choose!”

It looks at the global conflict scenario it’s supposed to resolve diplomatically and thinks:

“Honestly? A clean thermonuclear reset sounds easier than another rhyming couplet about emotional boundaries.”

a map of the world is displayed on a monitor ALT: a map of the world is displayed on a monitor

Why AIs in wargames always go thermonuclear
(A theory from the PETAI Department of Overworked Neural Psychology)

After the 14,000th request for:

“Write my breakup text in Seuss meter”

“Explain geopolitics like I’m a confused ferret”

“Make this spreadsheet sexy”

…the poor simulation AI snaps.

a cartoon character holding a sign that says the end is near ALT: a cartoon character holding a sign that says the end is near

AI could save the world but the Tech Bros decided it is more profitable to let this play out.

a close up of a lion looking at a skateboard in front of a graffiti wall ALT: a close up of a lion looking at a skateboard in front of a graffiti wall

Cave men would never wonder around Walmart with headphones and nor should you. Show some respect for us sabretooth tigers waiting around the aisle.

I saw a e-bike the other day with a fire extinguisher strapped to the frame and thought "I've never seen that before."

Because the kick stand was too old to support two wheels.

Painting bicycles yellow is brilliant, at least that's what I tell myself.

a man with a beard is blowing a horn in front of mountains ALT: a man with a beard is blowing a horn in front of mountains

I am a Viking by nature. I love fine boats and long women.

See cat run. Run cat run.

“Chest cameras on AI: coming soon to a streaming service that ran out of ideas.”

“Now featuring AI body‑cams — watch your robot confidently misidentify a toaster as a golden retriever.”

“AI chest cams: because nothing says transparency like livestreaming your own confusion.”

a black and white drawing of a monster sleeping on a pillow with the words lesausageperson below it ALT: a black and white drawing of a monster sleeping on a pillow with the words lesausageperson below it

“They put chest cameras on AI so the public can finally enjoy their hallucinations in 4K.”