Pussy Control.

End of list.

I bought some men’s boots for a mannequin at work. Less than 24 hours after placing that order, I had THREE marketing emails from the shoe company. If these shoes were for me, I would cancel the order out of spite. How many pairs of $200 boots do people typically buy in a 24 hour period? Am I crazy?

Sometimes simplicity is the way to go. This half-baked theory brought to you by Breyer’s Natural Vanilla Ice Cream in a cone. Not a sugar cone, but a cheap ass cake cone. The ones that taste like styrofoam if you eat them by themselves.

As clinically high strung person, I have to smoke daily or I will harm others.

And the BEST song to strip to.

My electric frypan died so now I have to use an acoustic one.

two images of the human body's circulatory system. One of them with good cable management

The human circulatory system, before and after proper cable management.

I just walked into the living room, finding Dylan having gelato for breakfast. I joked, “That’s a sexy breakfast. What you got there?”

His answer?

“Oatmeal.”

And it is “Never let a poet lie to you” Björk. Underrated version.

Correct. My mom makes a very fancy and excellent banana pudding that has Eagle brand condensed milk in it. That’s how you know it is good. Pudding from a can with wet cookies? Pass, thanks.

16 bean soup

Amateurs.

That person that showed up to tell me how to live has been blocked. Of course Dylan is kind and treats me well. He’s also hilarious and smarter than me. I was stoked on his looks for a minute. So fucking sue me. Damn.

My partner has the best lookin ears and nose I ever saw. Waking up next to this guy is a mind trip. He picked me? I must be doing something right.

The head of the FBI isn't supposed to be getting blackout drunk. He's supposed to be cross-dressing

Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. When the fear has done, there shall be nothing.

A black and white photo of a long haired brunette with a wide open smile and stage lights behind.

I don’t want to go back to the 60s or the 80s. I just want to go back to last week, before I knew what a Clavicular was.

I block people who irritate me every day without making a list about it. Like this user we’re talking about now, for instance.

Without saying your age, post your favorite film that was released when you turned 18.

deli&cia food place

I'm at the deli. I'm at the central intelligence agency. I'm at the combination deli & cental intelligence agency.

The self assured smile of someone who has no problem finding consensual sex partners with the age old combo of looks and charm

Sorry, I thought this was a picture of me as a doctor.

Begging the algorithm to stop showing me posts from folks I don’t follow saying their dog died.

Cybertruck in Richmond VA with a vinyl wrap advertising a used car dealership with some stereotypical car-dealer guy face on it

Cybertruck in Richmond VA with a vinyl wrap advertising a used car dealership with some stereotypical car-dealer guy face on it

cybertruck owners are achieving levels of unfuckability scientists previously believed impossible

I prefer carbio.

Egészségére from Nashville, Tennessee, USA.

I thought they decided it was caused by ergotism?

Catalina Tattoos.

I exercised today and now my legs are HOT. Not sexy, but warm. I feel like I am cooking. I hate it.