We can't go on together with

Six people dancing - still from The Wicker Man

Sing us a song, you're the wicker man
Sing us a song tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for a sacrifice
And you've got us feelin' alright

Failed my James Bond audition as 'was too old, not good at acting' and had 'a bit of a gut'. Onwards.

Shitsleeves.

Trump slagging Pope makes his Henry VIII performance almost complete. Just needs to compose an ice cream van tune for a full house.

Remake Valkyrie.

"Son, did you chop down the cherry tree?"

"Fuck yeah, you crazy bastard."

Jesus with sacred heart and holding up two fingers.

Two words? I know this! All Rise by Blue.

Moving away from all the incessant noise, a simple cabin in the woods, a quiet life, foraging for food, chopping logs, get good at both, start making berry broth and carving Greek hero miniatures, take pics, then videos, upload, become sm sensation, move away from the noise, head into the sewers fin

Slightly outdated reference. Easy joke. 4/10.

Remember when Oliver Reed turned up on Aspel & Co looking at his phone.

"So, you finally found me.
*pours two whiskys*

I trust the chestnut mine is well."

Starring Richard Keys as Alan Partridge

Every morning, I regime change my pants.

Two people in shadow standing in front of large sun. Title Spice Bag.

Dune Ireland.

"Fuck you, bread."

*Pete Hegseth making a sandwich*

- They're very secretive about honey in Russia.

- KGB?

- The whole flippin' hive!

Farage and Trump having dinner together tonight. The Swedish Chef is cooking pufferfish.

[School of Rock playground]

6yo Bruce Dickinson: Can I play with madness?

6yo Suggs: No.

Bruce: *runs to the hills*

Alan partridge holding a dictaphone to Lynn's ear.

Odysseus: "I'm hooome!"

Penelope: "How was the journey?"

Odysseus: [looks at the camera and shrugs] "So-so."

Audience shrieks with laughter, credits roll, you have been watching.

Comedy duo Trevor and Simon in black shirts

Simon, in white jumper, and Trevor, in maroon blazer, from TV show Wonder Man.

Trevor & Simon & Simon & Trevor.

Jurgen Klopp has a one-eyed brother called Simon.

Mountbatten no doubt thought they were strippers for his birthday. Lovely stuff.

Sean Connery spends Ash Wednesday looking at bums.

If I was a singer, I'd be called Lent. When inane TV presenters ask the audience to 'give it up' for me, they wouldn't know whether to cheer or stop eating chocolate for a bit. Morons.

Beautiful. I have Adagio for Strings soundtracking this scene.

EXT: Day. The grave of Noel Edmonds. A figure lies face down in the freshly dug soil, sobbing inconsolably.
CAPTION: GREYFRIARS BLOBBY.

The Skeleton is an extreme 'bit of a sit down' so makes sense GB would get a medal.