The routine and the rain.

Who is in?

I want peace but I also want to fuck shit up

Good morning to the cranky poets only

I’m not afraid of love
or its consequence of light

im clinically incapable of putting up with this shit, i fear

you know the first fucker to eat a BLT was like 𝑤𝑒𝑙𝑙 𝑔𝑜𝑑𝑑𝑎𝑚𝑛

Just when I'm about to fall asleep the monster under my bed gets talkative.

as soon as i find the way out of my depression hole it's so over for everyone, except me who will be so back

Jeffrey Epstein’s Lawyer Announces He Feels Safer as a Republican

Only the Director of the Federal Bureau of Investigations could put out a story about how the 2020 election was stolen to distract from the fact the Epstein Files haven't been released and that he is an alcoholic.

FBI Director says arrests ‘coming soon’ on 2020 rigged election conspiracy FBI Director Kash Patel: "We have the information that backs President Trump's claim.”

1/ Looks like the FBI director is trying to fight to hold onto his job by currying favor with the president after recent revelations about his personal conduct. www.democracydocket.com/news-alerts/...

I’m feeling grief for the version of me that used to twist myself into knots trying to be enough for all the wrong people.

Cop: you have an outstanding warrant

Me: why thank you

When you don't legislate the shit out of businesses, they naturally turn into nightmares.

If you can’t beat my ass or make me cum, your opinion is irrelevant.

Degaussing my mutuals

No one cares if your balls smell good once you reach a certain age 😢

Going through my dog's phone and it looks like he's been getting told he's a good boy by another man

"now that's what i call a traumatizing experience from my childhood that has dictated how i live my life as an adult" in the Now That's What I Call Music! style.

"Fat Pikachu Turns 30 Years Old Today" captioning Fat Pikachu saying "My Back Hurts."

Have I told you about the time I accidentally passed the Dutchie to the right hand side and was banned from all future 420 gatherings?

A golden egg just popped out of my pussy

Modesty is vanity's craftier stepsister.

The great thing about being unapproachable is that i never get approached

If no one told you today, nice tits

im taking these art classes because i should be able to draw my own conclusions

Public Service Announcement: Marijuana affects the memory.

God, I sure fucking hope so.

Bro have you even tried being whimsical about it?!