just saw John fetterman riding a balrog

just got kicked out of a bar for being “too brave”

Ah, well. We'll get them next year.

'Them' being the forces of good.

Man Dies After Secret 4-Year Battle With Gorilla

Man Dies After Secret 4-Year Battle With Gorilla
theonion.com/man-die...

Who lets the world burn? A mass movement must meet the climate crisis

We didn't set the world on fire — oligarchs did.

The rich are deliberately sacrificing our homes and neighborhoods so that the profit train never stops.

The only way out is a mass movement that tackles the problem down at the root, the capitalist system.

www.jphilll.com/p/who-lets-t...

69% Blame CEO Murder on US Healthcare System New poll shows Luigi Mangione’s anger shared by most Americans

Wow: 69 percent of Americans believe health insurance claim denials are at least partly responsible for the UnitedHealthcare CEO's death

hope santa got laid today. big guy deserves it

Name a non-LOTR character that could resist the One Ring

Luigi's Manifesto Exclusive: read Luigi Mangione's 262-word manifesto on the killing of UnitedHealthcare CEO

I got the Luigi Mangione manifesto. The real one, not the forgery circulating online. www.kenklippenstein.com/p/luigis-man...

Ugh FINE I'll show up to work "sober" to lead the department of defense. YES without "sexually assaulting" everyone, christ anything else?

HUNTER: thank you for pardoning me dad

JOE: no such thing as a free lunch jack. I need you. [produces two crack pipes] we only have a few weeks left to figure out a cure for cancer

what is this referring to?

losing a rap battle so bad i call my lawyer

i walked into the dentist office and they were shooting x-rays at each others balls

i have fully recovered from the anvil that was dropped on me

Mark Wahlberg has the same disposition as a chimpanzee, the potential to be pretty funny if he’s being coaxed into it but also a very real threat to everyone around him

👑

Newt Gingrich watching you die

How I sit waiting for you to realise you’ve been poisoned

it’s simple. the clown sells you meat. the little stripes man wants to steal the meat. there is a large smiling mound, purple mound, and we don’t know what he does. but we trust him

One hundred dogs just bit me

idk what this means but it made me laugh

and his wooden wife

god should kill every single fucking one of us