I am just imagining a thousand math teachers flipping their tables in slow motion like Alan Rickman.

Too much man 🐧

whats so crazy to me is the only job that chatbots could actually eliminate right now is ceo, every company could save millions today right now by replacing their ceo with a computer program that just parrots what other ceos say

You wouldn’t handle an inning in Denver! 🦝

The disappearance of blended yogurt options is my dumb recession indicator

Idk I think I’d giggle until I got frustrated! Cats would bite at the straw so maybe livestock would as well?

Oh yeah it’s a whole thing!

In white chalk on a sidewalk: “67 IS STUPID,” with that last word underlined three times.

Meanwhile, a new generation of critics boldly contradicts the conventional wisdom of the past, unafraid to bludgeon sacred cows with economical prose.

A child’s handwriting in pink chalk on the sidewalk: “FLOWERS ARE LOWKEY Kinda FIRE”

A new generation of poets rises, inspired by the same springtime that roused Dickinson and Shakespeare. A torch, passed.

If I was JD Vance’s wife I would jump out of an airplane

just to be clear, everyone, when 8 pm EDT comes and goes, regardless of what does or does not happen, the president still threatened genocide and war crimes and we should still impeach, arrest, and try him

Screenshot of a tweet. Original tweet says “Brady Tkachuk getting his ass beat on pride night is a win for everyone” and the quote tweet says “New Pride flag just dropped” with a photo of Brady Tkachuk getting his ass beat

Hopefully you saw this from the other night?

this is strangely similar to how some men go around arguing that everyone cheats on their spouse anyway

Rather than googling what song this is, I’m going to imagine it was “Barbra Streisand” by Duck Sauce 🎶 🦆

I Work Very Hard, And I Would Like To Try Cake By A Horse Hello. I am a horse. I work very hard at my job of being a horse. When humans say move the heavy thing, I move the heavy thing. When humans sit on top of me and pull on my head, I carry them where they want to go. The main food the humans give me is hay and oats. But I am thinking it would be nice to have a different food. I am thinking I would like to try cake. Yes, yes. Cake. I know all about it. When humans eat cake, it is in glad times. It is the food for a celebration, such as when a woman becomes 47. I have seen cake on the Fourth of July. When humans have a cake, they stand around it and clap hands and smile and say happy birthday at each other. Sometimes there are beautiful markings on a cake, such as balloons or a pink shape. Sometimes the top of a cake is on fire and a boy must blow on the fire with mouth wind. This is the scariest cake. I do not want this kind. But I will eat any other cake. Any cake that is not the fire cake that tries to kill the boy. Please understand: I do not get money for doing work. I do not get to go inside the house. All I am either doing my horse job or standing in my pen or eating food off the floor. I always do these things. But I have never once gotten cake and I would like it very much. I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children. I am more helpful to the farm. Children do not move the heavy things like me or let anyone ride on them. And yet they get cake. Maybe the humans will realize this. Maybe they will say, "You know who deserves cake? That horse. That horse whose back we are always on." Every day I dream about what it will be like if I get to eat cake. Here is what will happen. First, I will walk to the cake and putt my nose at it like hrrfff to make and stomping my hooves to make sure it is not a snake. Then I will trot in a circle to show that I am a horse and I am large. After that, I will nuzzle the cake to …

The horse op-ed is an instant classic. I can't tell you how much joy this piece gives me.

It should be taught in every introductory writing class in no small part because the horse arguments are so compelling. "I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children."

This is the good stuff.

“Gobble Devil,” like an evil turkey, right? 😆

To be clear with how I feel about it. Anyone in the military who directs or carries out strikes on desalination plants should be in prison when this is over.

Do you have a source for reading more about this? Sounds entertaining

Fell off the incline because I saw a cool bird

I think my favorite part of this suit is where the guy who was suing because Afroman said he fucked his wife said on the witness stand that he did not know for sure that Afroman did not fuck his wife.

A chart like this, but it’s the amount of time I’ve spent listening to Afroman music in 2003 and now 2026

Team USA’s military theme clearly fucked the vibes. They should pick a different theme next time, like “enchantment under the sea.”

Recently moved from Pittsburgh/Cleveland to central PA. Weird: no Lenten fish fries/spaghetti dinners.

Weirder: no St. Patrick's Day celebrations??

I learned what a cougar tail donut was yesterday - could make another bun option (basically a maple log)

Laughing at how I have a paper accepted to APSA but I’ll literally be giving birth that week 😂

Happy Ides of March... man, senators don't get together and stab tyrants like they used to

List of countries by tax revenue - Wikipedia

Blunt reality: Americans are not "taxed enough already." We aren't taxed enough, actually.

Norway collects 31% of GDP as taxes. The United States collects 12% of GDP as taxes.

That, not "military spending," is the real reason that Greenlanders have "free" health care and Americans don't.

"I got my PhD by writing prompts instead of doing research, I'm winning"

got some bad news, there still no jobs and now you also know nothing