Some timeline stuff:
— We expect to get InfoWars.com after the judge clears it in a couple of weeks.
— We'll build a world of characters on the site and across social media. Tim Heidecker is in charge, and we have grand designs.
— Visit theonion.info, buy a subscription, help us dominate the world.
A breaking update from @timheidecker.bsky.social.
With the help of the Sandy Hook families, The Onion has reached a long-awaited deal to take over InfoWars.
We've enlisted the help of @timheidecker.bsky.social, who will be InfoWars' Creative Director.
Please stand by for more.
Several people with signs like this at the Boston Marathon today
This war is so damn confusing. It’s why we shouldn’t let drunks and dementia patients run it.
Raye, This Music May Contain Hope
What a clown show.
If there are any Democrats who are thinking of running for the presidency on 2028 on anything less than a clear agenda of widespread prosecution for this administration's corruption and fundamental structural changes to ensure it can't happen again, they should just stop right there.
Where’s Abbot?!
Can’t wait to see what the rest of the week brings
I hope dem presidential candidates are paying attention. 👀
Things we never see @markhamillofficial.bsky.social
Cartoon by Michael de Adder
Always one
So happy to hear you will be involved
🤗😆🐶🦴
Bank: “We noticed an unusual purchase.”
Me: “What was it?”
Bank: “A salad.”
Me: “Yeah that’s fraud.”
Boston, where you can read a book while your team clinches a spot in the playoffs...
📸: @victoria.sarkissian
Let’s end tonight on a high note from Coldplay
We just got the first hard economic data showing the effects of the war, and it shows inflation surging. Lemme take two minutes to explain what it all means while talking into a baby koala's butt.
Cartoon view of a dangerous & colossal failure by this regime…
YES!! 🙌🏻
👏👏👏👏👏👏
Happy 50th anniversary to “All the President’s Men” — a film that owes its existence to Redford, who bought the film rights, developed the script and cajoled a reluctant Woodward & Bernstein.
I thought it was “a great character study,” he said later. But, for months, “they didn’t return my calls.”
Breslow is above his head. I’ll never forget his World Series “performance” where he and Salty threw the ball around the infield one inning. Led to a bunch of runs. The only thing missing was the Benny Hill music.
I went and saw Project Hail Mary.
A guy came in with his service dog and the dog sat there the whole time just concentrating on the movie.
Afterwards I told the guy I was amazed your dog watched the movie like that.
He replied, me too especially because he hated the book.
Good morning Blue Sky.
YES, THIS IS REAL! You're looking at a total solar eclipse, captured by the crew onboard Artemis II.
Note how there is a faint glow illuminating the nearside of the Moon (left side). This is light being reflected back from Earth!
Chunk don’t care
