They had to break the tape at the finish line before it got there.

A sign from a zoo in Japan that says “Beware of flying urine.” It’s purple faded lettering on a bright yellow background.

I would like this put on a t shirt. Faded font, colors. It’s all perfect.

So... if the armed forces can't get food to the ships... how are families getting food to the ships...?

To be real, as an unpaid, unemployed individual with a microphone and camera, I'd totally audition for a future paid sponsorship.

☎️ (call me)

Oh wait, that's not hip.

📲 (text me)

It's one of those delights you don't want to eat too many of because you don't want to get tired of them.

A prototype decanter featuring “likenesses” of Kirk, Spock and McCoy from Star Trek The Motion Picture.

Less Spock, McCoy & Kirk… more Gandalf, Aragorn and Frodo.

Remember: No matter how old you are, that's how old you look.

Ugh, an order from that pile of shit to attend the Kid Rock concert....

I was going to say "imagine" but I think we won't have to imagine.

Tomy Plus USS Enterprise from The Motion Picture YouTube video by Matt West

Last year I was privileged to get in on a funding campaign for a lit statue of the USS Enterprise from The Motion Picture, developed by TOMY Plus. I did a video on it showing the lights and highlighting the ups and downs. Join us, won't me?

youtu.be/nsmfMVFA4yY

"Instead we got a Poof from South Carolina".

All the while my shit train gots no brakes.

Built protein bars in a sour blue raspberry and sour peach flavor.

Mood: feeling seen

I knew Johnny was very young when he started... but he's 90! I didn't remember John Byner until I just looked him up. No one did Jackie Mason like he did.

"it's not for me to say"

Whaaaaatttt?

Nnnoooooooooo....

Still laugh-cried.

Morning Coffee Medellín, Comuna 13: March 18th YouTube video by Matt West

youtu.be/ZVgshxUEzVw

Good morning to everyone except the folks rushing to put the new SpiderMan trailer on every piece of social media possible so I'll catch glimpses of it on my phone rather than on my TV where the trailer should be viewed...

I should just stop being on social media, really. It's not your fault.

Finally found that ladder to jump up your butt.

(My absolute favorite Crow quote)

It fascinates me that the folks in some semblance of power will LITERALLY point out the things they're not gonna do anything about.

I’ve never been on a flight with a men’s/women’s wine room.

Good news. We get chili tomorrow.

A Lexus Bus Sized SUV on the ice

The Zamboni is ineffective.

Columbus Blue Jackets hockey.

I can’t wait to see the strongly worded letter for this one. It’s going to be so strongly and worded.

Oh, one of "those" fans.

Top: Prune Juice with Worf from Star Trek super imposed on the bottle with "Shit Like A Warrior" as the tag line at the bottom of the bottle. Bottom: An ad for Cologuard, shitting in a box.

Today's ironic Instagram:

3 feet tall Hollow chocolate Easter rabbits at Costco.

Three feet tall chocolate bunnies. Costco ain’t playin.

I kinda want one.

Fish is meat.

I may be a lot of things, but I am NOT someone that would put “what say you” at the end of a social media post.

What the hell is that? It’s not enough engagement bait to say “what do you think” or “Thoughts?”

I ask YOU, Morton Kondracke.