[Ben Affleck commentary track]: ... and so I asked Michael Bay, like, this doesn't make a lot of sense to me. Why would it be easier to teach a cokehead monkey to dunk than to just get a dunking monkey addicted to coke? And he told me to shut.. shut the fuck up. So that was the end of that talk.

Breaking free from my restrainers and giving one last full sprint soccer kick to the dead horse

Well now let's not do repeated flawless people's elbows to a dead horse

Audibly counting down the cool down on my deft kick ability

Going to confession and telling the priest that I have sinned by being lustful for a particular priest.. but you wouldn't know him.. he goes to another church...

Lady at work is often calling people from a list and she'll often say to them "okay I'm stroking you off" or she'll report that "I've stroked off everyone" and I just don't get involved cause I don't have time for that conversation

The, fucken, y'know.. [gestures vaguely] the dragoons

Took my money to the money changer and when he gave it back it was still money

Starting a gracious deep bow and finishing it off with a front flip

I would never go "against the grain". Grain defines who I am as a person, I'll never turn my back on grain

Before embarking on a journey of revenge, first remember to dig two graves. One for your opponents first death that comes with his body, and the second for his second death that comes when his name is spoken for the last time

Me: Now mind my words boys..

My 7 adopted sons, each more delicate and lithe than the last: what is it, Papa?

I've got rakish cads in every metropole in the land prepared to swindle you

Waifs and wastrels abound

Strawberries getting too damn big now

Set phasers to emasculate

Grey meal

Well it's like my people always say: "don't spend all your action points in the development phase on moats if you're going to attack the Frog Kingdom during the combat phase"

Before smokestacks were a thing guys just smoked cigars "like a guy smoking a cigar". There was simply no simile for such a behavior it was pure and of itself

Eating a grain of sand and suddenly experiencing a series of flashbacks wherein I am slowly worn down by thousands of years of wind rain and ice

If I'm being honest, not all of them. Not even close really

My neck hurts already pray for me tomorrow

Last band was allergic to developing any kind of groove. Tragic.

Yeah if we could leave all the lights on that would be great. Do you think we could get them turned up actually

Going to the tuesday evening all-ages metal show tomorrow

You fool, "american cheese" isn't made from the breastmilk of american women, don't be preposterous.

Like everything else, they outsourced that to the chinese in the 80s and now all american cheese is made from the breastmilk of chinese women

I try not to take it personally that people only want to get in my bunker when they think there is a bomb

Help! My holy leader's deceased body is decaying, and I've tried everything!

The other chipmunks unionized and while I wouldn't draw a 1-to-1 connection there is definitely a thru-line to Alvin taking his own life