Things to respond with when fitness accounts slide into your DMs:
- who’d you vote for
- are your vaccines up to date
- do Black lives matter
- which team should a trans female athlete be allowed to play on
Uber Driver Casually Mentions This His First Time Driving
Uber Driver Casually Mentions This His First Time Driving
How about I post unhinged church stuff today I feel like posting it
Back in church days I heard that a speaker would go around to churches saying that he could find gay people by holding his finger out and using it like a detecting device and he was say “beep beep beep” while walking around with his finger in front of him and taught churches to do this. TRUE story.
When I moved to Tulsa someone handed me a book on portals in Tulsa and I didn’t read it cuz I ain’t summoning nuthin
DENTIST: Have you been flossing?
ME: Have you?
DENTIST: (sweating) THIS ISN’T ABOUT ME!
TNG "Sub Rosa"; an #iconic shot of Picard walking onto the bridge from a lower turbolift into a thick fog around his feet while Data stands behind his station and scans the fog with his tricorder
Correction I don’t want to cook anything tonight
With the help of the Sandy Hook families, The Onion has reached a long-awaited deal to take over InfoWars.
We've enlisted the help of @timheidecker.bsky.social, who will be InfoWars' Creative Director.
Please stand by for more.
I am working out more and I am totally okay with not looking like dudes on steroids.
There is not enough coffee in the world today
Cat Distribution System strikes again
Guess I’m next then lol
Trying to decide on making burgers, tacos or seafood tonight.
The Onion has reached a deal to acquire Infowars
• It will be turned into a parody site of itself
• Has the support of the Sandy Hook families
“A lot of people gave up on doing the right thing over the last two years. Despite an insane amount of threats & bullshit, we persevered"
(via Variety)
Someone said if we know who Topanga is we need to get a colonoscopy and… I don’t like it
Meditation today: when meditating today I saw an old street from college but it started folding over and in on itself and the entire area opened to like a much larger space, a true space of existing as the realities folded in over themselves
Advil Lavigne
It’s Monday and it feels like Friday but not in a good way
Throwback! Me about 2006.
This is single handedly the funniest scene from any Star Trek
Cajun food today!
what is the charge. what crime has been done
A little quote of mine from 16 years ago opens this thoughtful perspective by Ramy Aziz, PhD on rethinking host-pathogen interactions and future therapeutics from the perspective of the microbes as chronicled in their genomes 🦠 🧬
#bacteria #genomics
tanguy destable is probably the fake name id give an annoying guy hitting on me at the beach
Seeing people online tell me not to millennial is gonna make me millennial even harder
The Masters of the Universe menu from Dennys including pancakes with mint chocolate ice cream on top.
Will Farrell in Elf
The menu, the chef.
Yes, those are pancakes with ice cream on top! By the power of diabetes!
When a sperm whale was asked to confirm this, he first lied, then when pressed, blamed it on someone else.
That feeling when you have so much goo.
Thermal Segregation and Reddening in Europa's Double Ridges
astrobiology.com/2026/04/ther... #astrobiology #astrochemistry #astrogeology
