I'm a tad late but I just wanted to share that on Father's Day Vanessa and Gregory handed me a "World's Okayest Dad" card and even though they clearly meant it as a joke it was remarkably difficult to not burst into tears right then.
Hate to break it to you but I'm not a demon. Though many would disagree. All that would make me is annoyed.
I'm dragging you down with me.
Nah mate. We're both going to hell
It's me.
(How'd you like that, Golden? Stole your damn catchphrase. Hah.)
Harley I am terribly sorry I called you Henry that one time, it was an honest mistake, your names are just very similar, please come back.
Harley please return my calls we can work things out
I heard my mate Harley Sawyer is trying to steal my gimmick so I had to Come Back again just to spite him.
To anyone I offended this year: work on yourself. I don't want to have to do it again next year. I hate repeating myself. I WILL do it, but you should work on it.
I never made a "Merry Christmas" post simply because I did not wish anyone a Merry Christmas. I resent the thought of anyone feeling an ounce of joy while I cannot experience such a thing. I need everyone to be as miserable as I feel going into this next year.
This is the only kind of Christmas 'spirit' I'm bringing to the function.
I need to hide. Immediately. You NEVER saw me.
NOT SWEET. BAD. REALLY BAD FOR ME
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKFUCKFUCKFU
Oh no.
Oh no no no no no no oh fuck oh god
Mate, we're all doomed by the narrative. It's not that serious. Have some fun with it.
I missed you too, Mikey. ❤
Rude, I literally crawled out of hell to be here and this is how you greet me. Your own father. 💔
Hey Michael
Guess who's back :]
I have no clue what you're on about but it sounds about right for you.
Hah. My Cassidy thought so too. They never really got along in death.
When I was stuck in hell sometimes I liked to sit by Charlotte's box. I knew it wasn't actually her in there. None of them were actually there. They were all fabrications, copies made by Cassidy. But I liked to pretend. She was the only one who didn't hate me. She was my family once. I miss her.
When my son told me he was gay I burst into tears. But not for the reason you think.
You see, I understand that statistically, men earn about 20% more than women. Marrying a man instead of a woman is simply a wise long-term financial decision.
So proud of my son ❤
Christ, don't even make me think about the price of gas these days...
I am a grown man and I refuse to make a fool of myself on a bloody skateboard like that little Fitzgerald twat used to do.
Lizzy liked roller skating, however... I suppose I could give that a try. If I'm desperate.
Apologies for my absence. As it turns out, dying and coming back to life with a whole new, fake identity means I have to get a whole new driver's license and that process has gotten at least ten times more complicated than when I was younger. I miss my car...
//
We do NOT have the fuckin money for a fursuit, Afton
-🐰
...getting to be Spring Bonnie at the very least would have been nice.
-🔪
You're not a slasher villain you're a whole ass REAL ASS serial killer. That's weird.
-🐰
