The FBI Director, the DC US Attorney, and the Secretary of Defense walk into a bar.

Apparently like every day.

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Iran’s LEGO rap video team claps back very hip-hopily… www.instagram.com/reel/DXIvXWI...

… and the next LEGO Iranian rap video writes itself 🎤

#GirlDinner

If it were kosher tho . . .

And prophets, apparently

Somebody tell Trump that Leo is thinking about it & let’s watch what happens on truth social

In Springsteen’s words: everybody has a Hungary heart

OMG 🏆

One of my cartoons in Monday's Metro

"I didn't know him!"

“Congress can compel full, unredacted release of the co-conspirator files. It can enforce the law it already passed. It can subpoena the acting Attorney General, who’s currently running the DOJ, while the Epstein files remain incomplete.

It does not need to put survivors on TV to do any of that.”

Dear international friends,

Do not travel to the United States this summer for the World Cup. It isn't safe for us, and it's absolutely not safe for you.

Sincerely,

An American citizen

Imagine devoting your life's work to perfecting the seatbelt and then the first time there's a serious accident every occupant of the car goes flying right through the windshield. This post is about the founding fathers.

one undercooked big mac is all we need

IT’S NEW BIKE DAY #30DoB #BikeGang #30DaysOfBiking
🌶️

Bees sleep between five and eight hours a day. They enjoy company and even hold each other's feet.

Cool. Arrest him.

I heard The Martian wasn’t even filmed on Mars. Hollywood, SMDH

For more secret plans, please refer to his stupid social media posts

❌👑 except...

“First one to flip gets the best deal, pass it on.”

Woke unreasonably angry about an imaginary traffic situation that did not happen to me and I’m going back to sleep for better dreams. #DoBetterSubconscious #MoreBikes

If most of you did: happier
If I did: muchly horrified

This week I learned from my sister, a nurse & wound care specialist, that most cases she sees of abcessed scrotal infection are caused by “A Manscaping Incident.”
😬
First of all, Jennifer, stop bringing this shit up at Sunday brunch. Secondly, thanks for the title of my next novel. 💪🏼

This whole exchange gave me liiife
😆😂

They are wearing masks at some airports. They were masked at O’Hare yesterday, for example.

Get it pressed now and manifest it into reality.