Bumping for the new followers

A Newsletter of Humorous Writing by Luke Burns & James Folta A weekly newsletter dedicated to humorous writing and humorous writers. We round up the best short humor pieces and funny articles every week, and have some fun extras ever...

In this week's newsletter @jamesfolta.com and I rounded up great writing by @scarletkmeyer.bsky.social and Robert Rooney in @mcsweeneys.net, Ally Mason in @pointsincase.com, and W.F. Carolyn in @robotbutt.bsky.social.

Check it out and subscribe at the link below!

My new rule for companies is if I’ve placed an order with you and it hasn’t arrived yet you have to stop sending me 25% off emails

Casting Notice for the Unaired CW Pilot Young Hamlet SYNOPSIS High school is no picnic for anyone, but especially if you’re one of Shakespeare’s most iconic leading men. Hamlet might be the big man on...

HORATIO
Hamlet’s best friend and the comic relief. He’ll have a crush on Ophelia, but it’s imperative she never gives him the time of day. We’ll give him an off-putting hobby that will be repulsive to women, like reading, to solve this.

So excited to be included on this week’s Newsletter of Humorous Writing! If you haven’t already, subscribe! buttondown.com/humorouswrit...

Honestly thank god this site doesn’t have drafts. Some of my thoughts do not need to be saved for posterity

My husband claims I talk about Robert Moses too much but I need him to know all the weird NYC girlies have a Robert Moses rant locked and ready to go at all times

Casting Notice for the Unaired CW Pilot Young Hamlet SYNOPSIS High school is no picnic for anyone, but especially if you’re one of Shakespeare’s most iconic leading men. Hamlet might be the big man on...

I'm on @mcsweeneys.net today making your hs English teacher openly weep www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/cas...

It’s my birthday, so if you have a crush on me you are legally required to tell me.

Did not realize they added lying to your constituents and betraying an entire country to the list of depression symptoms on the DSM

Cannot believe we just let Dan Brown write a book titled “The Secret of Secrets”. This man must be stopped

It's that time of year when Halloween decorations haven't all come down, and Christmas decorations are about to start going up. We're in...the Tim Burton Zone.

As someone who thought they were going to cross the street in under 40 minutes I would like to issue a formal condemnation of the Brooklyn Marathon and all of it's participants. Go as fast as you like but we all know where you're running, straight into the arms of your lord and master Beelzebub

All my meanest Reductress headlines are autobiographical ✨

Hocus Pocus (1993) kicks off because the main character has a crush on a goth chick which is beautiful, more movies should start this way

This is a hold over from surviving 90s diet/health food culture but I genuinely prefer popcorn with soy sauce/hot sauce on it instead of salt/butter

My husband was detained by ICE today

Juan Muñoz, an American citizen, father of 2, and local government official, was peacefully protesting w. other elected officials. He was assaulted and taken away

I have had zero contact or updates since

#SOS
@duckworth.senate.gov @durbin.senate.gov

They have an actor doing an aussie accent and its like on par with your 3rd grade niece trying to sound fancy

Getting my car inspected and the waiting room TV is like BLASTING a day time soap so loud its impossible to tune out and its like i did not consent to this

ICE agents assault amNewYork reporter at Federal Plaza immigration court; another journalist seriously injured after shove | amNewYork ICE agents assaulted amNewYork's own Dean Moses, and allegedly attacked another journalist, on Tuesday morning as they were documenting the ongoing arrests of

Five days ago, an ICE agent shoved a woman asking questions about the detention of her husband.

Today they attacked two journalists.

We cannot accept or normalize what has now become routine violence at 26 Federal Plaza. It has no place in our city.

“Your credit score changed” NO listen YOU CHANGED

Guy on threads was like “free tampons? Whats next? Free clothes, water, soap, shelter, clothes?” And its like buddy you are soooooo close

(Nat King Cole voice) Undeliverable, thats what you are

S1 Ep 8 Is the Girl Genius a Monster? The Brainwashing Cram School of Horror (Sailor Mercury has entered the chat)

In today's newsletter we meet the most responsible of the Sailor Scouts

scrrltmyr.substack.com/p/s1-ep-8-is...

how I feel asking for the name of the person in the health insurance billing dept right before our phone call ends

I guess I'll download another f&cking app. My phone is working pretty slow already and I'll definitely use this at least once™️

Freelance Writer Guidelines

I'm looking for pitches for @MotherJones' print culture section, Mixed Media! These are ~2,000-word essays that combine reporting, cultural criticism, historical research, and/or personal narrative. More details in our pitch guidelines here: www.motherjones.com/contribute/w...

A well meaning friend offered to get a portable charger because my phone is always dying and I had to explain I have several they’re just lost in different parts of my house and if I get a new one I will lose it too

We read a romance novel for my work book club and I swear the whole pitch was “what if your ex husband went to therapy?”