What if I had 2 daughters and named them Ana and Asia; Anesthesia and Euthanasia. Lol

It’s not a purse, it’s a carry system

Plastic will kill off humans if global warming and/or war doesn’t get us first lmao rip

All the “protein” craze recently is just a conspiracy by the elites to make us hear “pro-teen” over and over again to subconsciously change the public’s perception… lol #epsteinfiles #epsteinandtrumpfiles

Idky but I’ve always disliked Gorillaz. Not the Harambe kind, those are cool.

US Government be like: “My dog ate my Epstein files”

I used to be Alcohol-Maxxing, now I'm not.

Where can I get fitted for tampon size? Do they do that at Victoria’s Secret?

Green Day better play "American Idiot" at the Super Bowl today.

Metal outlet covers.

*Workplace Anti-Sexual Harassment Poster*:
"Work SMART, not HARD"

Straw ban? I thought that was a smoothie

Today (aka yesterday) I went to Micro Center. Driving there, a couple miles away, I saw a dude with his ball python walking down the street. Not that weird.. Then 2 dudes had their snakes with them in the store lol. No reptile convention happening cuz I asked haha. Weird coincidence

Last night I left my house. The Girl Scouts 360 no-scoped me right in front of AJs and they took six dollars

Ecstasy? EcstUSSY.

When will Apple Watch have an automatic fart tracker? I wanna know my farts per day. What’s my fart score?

Season 4 of Stranger Things: [Squelching wetly]

Always the babysitter, never the baby 😖

I wish I could call my dad and tell him the news that he died…

“Salad with chicken” and “chicken salad”; two completely different things

Ticks are fucking disgusting! Wretched!

#Photobucket has been holding my old photos hostage and desperately wants a ransom payment lol

“Republicunt” lol

Thank you to everyone who made it out for the #NoKings protests, for I was asleep and then worked lol but I was there in spirit

Funny Halloween costume idea? Hasan's dog Kaya. In support of her of course!

That’s all fair to say, I don’t think I would go as far as claiming she’s straight up abused either, IMO.

That’s not even the issue I’m concerned about. He seems so strict and annoyed with her all the time

I’ve seen enough, Hasan Piker needs to reconsider having a dog. Why is he so controlling, acting like a freakin weirdo… #freekaya

I just found out that I own an NFT, I was awarded it somehow lol.

Someone once told me that the reason your buttcrack exists is so you can wipe front to back… That’s not how that works but I think about it almost every time I poop