You have 3/5ths of a point

sorry man, maybe you can make yourself feel better by making fun of Beau Biden’s death again

math is weird

sometimes some numbers are bigger than other numbers

it’s not fair but what are you gonna do?

You know refugees aren’t allowed to vote, yes? At least not until they become citizens

Or do you usually buy things from people who don’t have that thing?

“holding a voting bloc in contempt”?

oh fuck fam this is new and shaky ground we’re trodding upon here

Reconstruction, unless I’m deeply mistaken

You know, it’s not illegal to lie to skinheads

You know who else famously used paid informants to infiltrate extremist groups?

The Justice Department.

“Listen, you can rig the jury pool with loyalists or you can have jurors who are smart enough at least to not eat the jury instructions.

These are mutually exclusive and the problem is I need both”

The “these aren’t the smartest guys and things got out of hand” paradox

As Jack says, that bird isn’t going anywhere.

It’ll always be there, waiting for us

Im so sorry

You know who else had the letters J and B in their name?

William Jennings Bryan

Checkmate, libs

/4 7. Mr. Patel does not brag he “vomited onto each branch of government plus the Post Office.” The Post Office is currently a part of the Executive Branch.

8. Mr. Patel has never sent a “dick pic” to Rep. Steny Hoyer while seeking actionable intelligence from an adult actress named Stacy.

Maybe when he sobers up he’ll realize what a stupid dunk this is

Let’s talk about my dude’s voiceover career prospects when he’s done with the astronaut thing

Pipes

7-11 was a part time job. Slurpees can’t melt steel beams. Do your own research 🧐

I see that we’re bro gong back anti Freemasonry!

Real retro lunatic bigotry my guy

Yes. I used to do social work adjacent stuff in both “early, proactive intervention” (mentoring programs) and then straight up inmate reentry/reintegration and this was a familiar term

It wasn’t often used colloquially though. More like grant proposals

“90%of the game is half mental” just works

You should take this back. Berra’s great sayings sound funny at first, then they make you think, “Wait a minute.” The best are like Japanese riddles.

The photo shows a wooden model of a cow giving birth accompanied by two men. One man calms the cow while the other ensures a proper delivery.The calf emerges from his mother, licking the hand of the man.

Models of everyday life were deposited in #Egyptian tombs. They were supposed to support the deceased in the afterlife. One of the most charming examples is the model of a #cow giving birth.
Carved in wood, painted.
Probably from Meir, #Egypt, dating c. 2040-1985 BC.

📷 Royal Ontario Museum
🏺

I never learn anything new about Buckley that makes me think “okay, maybe he wasn’t as bad as I thought”

“God rest ye merry gentlemen”

Young pope Leo, undated but he appears to be in his teens or early 20’s

young pope leo looks like a ska scene regular who goes by Upbeat but no one knows his real name

Me: [idly looking up info on popes]

Wikipedia: This list is incomplete; you can help expand it.

Me: wut?

Wikipedia: [lifts eyebrows suggestively]

From my perspective, like, “Yes it’s disrespectful. That’s how you treat people you don’t respect”

I said Trump was a gossipy, bitchy queen and got some DMs on threads and IG saying I was being disrespectful to the President?!

So, out of laziness, I responded via voice note instead of text in my broadcast channel.

Will put a transcription below for those who don’t like to listen.

I didn’t get that vibe from Rawls

Petty tyrant, ultimate symbol of the system existing to perpetuate itself, sure

Him being a racist makes a lot less interesting to me

“Yeah I called Trump Hitler but like in a good way”