what if there was a guy called mr penis

Go to Threads and search “bouncy house” just trust me

This sounds like a lyric in the prechorus of a very chill classic rock tune

We used to have Bob Eggs, Steve Nintendo, Johnny No Plane Crash. No we have no eggs, no Nintendo, many plane crash.

If I were Joe Rogan I’d simply be hilarious. Doesn’t seem that hard to me.

Remember: land doesn’t vote— oh wait hold on a sec

If I was in charge of the Democratic Party I’d have everyone act like a kid that streams madden online.

Yeah it’s definitely the eating thing.

I’m so done with adulting today 🙄 by the way I think adulting means watching adult films

zelenskyy fortnite skin

I just did premature ejaculation but for pee. Not sure if there’s a word for it

Tim Robinson:

Right on schedule

Bro I promise I’m not crashing out bro I swear to god it’s just a temper tantrum bro you gotta believe me

Super Bowl script leaked

People are always say shit like “ummmm” or “uhhh”

Remember when RFK jr was asked if any other allegations were gonna come out and he was like “yeah probably”

Asking the bar to put on a replay of the Lions Commanders game.

The Kansas City Chiefs once again going to the Super Bowl is yet another societal net-negative brought on in part by a podcaster.

This season of the national football league kinda fell off, low key

Steely Dan on the football broadcast

Costco just announced that it gives DEI 5 Booms on the boom meter.

It’s commonly known as alcoholism

Banger

It’d be crazy if there was a baby named Eddie

Kinda glad I won’t have to watch what saquon would’ve done to that lions defense

Still blaming stuff on daylight savings time. It’s not illegal to do that

Cute without the ‘E’ (my life into pieces)

“It’s illegal not to hire me”

Nominative determinism