It’s nice to see someone finally fighting fire with fire.

Yes please.

I just gotta say—Good for Jeremy! 😏

🥵

It was EXTREMELY rude for the song while people were leaving the Chicago Theater after the Crazy Ex Girlfriend live show to be “Don’t Be A Lawyer.”

Especially given that I have to go home to prepare for bed to do that tomorrow. 😑

Feeling handsome tonight.

Can I lick? 🥺

The one and only!

Don’t forget!

I knew it.

Me awake in bed at 3 AM looking at my phone after I promised myself I would go to sleep early

Controversial opinion: “We will nip it in the bud” is one of the laziest lyrics I’ve ever heard. And yet it’s in Les Miserables.

Controversial opinion: “We will nip it in the bud” is one of the laziest lyrics I’ve ever heard. And yet it’s in Les Miserables.

If anyone is in the market for a new forklift, my instagram ads have you covered.

Also if you need to sell your HVAC company.

I’d love to

Seeking facial hair recommendations. I can just trim it but open to all options. Any ideas?

Seeking facial hair recommendations. I can just trim it but open to all options. Any ideas?

Damn times have changed.

a woman wearing a white hat is sitting in a car with #schitts creek written on the bottom ALT: a woman wearing a white hat is sitting in a car with #schitts creek written on the bottom

*lady Gaga and Doechii drop a song together*

The Gays™:

My Trader Joe’s crush wasn’t working today. 😞

I went to a different guy and was reminded how many fewer lingering eye contacts and smirks are normal for an interaction at checkout.

Happy First Contact Day!

FINE, you win. Ryan is now available made to order.

Wow - that sold out fast! So many of you reached out to us asking if we could keep him around for a little while longer, it felt only right that we give everyone the opportunity to satisfy their plane blowjob urges.

✨ go.were.dog/planetoppy

a man is watching a football game on a tv ALT: a man is watching a football game on a tv

Romance smut I’m reading: “You might be the last thing I need, but you’re the first thing I want when I wake up to in the morning.”

Me:

*speechless*

Okay maybe not. The avgeek in me also loves this. Lol

There is no ethical consumption of HBO’s Harry Potter series You can’t without supporting Rowling’s transphobic bigotry.

There is no ethical consumption of HBO’s Harry Potter series

I just want everyone to know my hockey number was 21 well before Scott Hunter played for the Admirals.

His name is Bear. He’s the best. 🐶

Friend 🥰

I'll be your Raphael. 🐂