Why are we just hearing from him now? Where has he been the last 15 months?

Cats wearing hoodies and looking tough. Caption reads: “What’s the difference between cats and dogs? Cats don’t work for the cops”

20 Hits!!

Pretty accustomed!

And 30 minutes of commercials before the feature begins.

That is one punchable face.

also, chuck e cheese is disgusting they’re like if hep c became a children’s casino

Ronald McDonald has never once denounced terrorism

Who wants to live in a world where nobody understands Fonzie references?

It wasn’t a picture of me as Jesus it was a picture of me as a doctor because I help a lot of people.

I'm writing my own eulogy because I don't want my family to say I was a control freak.

The Kool-Aid Man is a creature made of glass and water yet he can break through a brick wall. He is an abomination and we must stop him at all cost.

In a few years it’ll be “magnifisawbuck”

I always tell them whoever put you up to this is not your friend.

[trying to sleep]

brain: but what about the paint color Teal Sedaka

return of the Jedi is not possible without the receipt of the Jedi

🙏

how much money does the marine corps lose

Imagine being made from the contents of supernovae that happened billions of years ago but you have to join a Teams call?

Single-panel cartoon by Ellis Rosen. Two white lab rats at the beach. The one wearing sunglasses and sitting under a beach umbrella says to the one with a pencil and a book called "1001 Mazes": "You need to learn how to relax."

Thinking about how my parents lived long enough to see bridge tolls go to $2.00

Man posing in front of the Statue of Liberty.

The Man Who Shot Biberty Valance?

I would say everyone gets a pass today in particular.

👏👏👏

It is THE thing.

Won’t bother with Catch 22 until I watch Catch 1-21.

Will I understand Slaughterhouse 5 if I haven't seen the first 4?