ok if we just shut up and give them this one then play the long game, it opens up a lot of poetic irony come 2028

@helldude.bsky.social wanted to make sure you saw this despite the block

Oh and it being on twitter

A psychopath breaks into the tooth fairy's palace to kill santa claus

Death's granddaughter has to save him.

And death steps in for Santa to give out presents.

If that's not a confusingly tempting summary, then maybe you pass

I watched going postal a few weeks back

I feel like you can only really appreciate if you read the books which is not a great review of a movie

That time a lady next to me took her shoes and socks off and put them on a seat in front of me

I'm guessing clutch pizza guy

I log in, post a rare helldude, get retweeted by him, then retreat until I am needed again
Simple as

Oh I'm certain those traps are natty, sure bro

Oh we went to the animal fair
The monkey and Toocan were there...

My congratulations to all Baseball Perverts. It was their "super bowl" last night and it seems they all had a very bad time (in their culture that's how you have a good time)

Fun facts! Trump is saying the ballroom is going to cost 100m more than he quoted!

Also he hasn't submitted any blueprints!

Also the prez bunker is under...oh gosh, the east wing!

Not concerned at all

I desperately need an @alabseries.bsky.social on this. Don't even edit it, just read it out loud and hoot/holler etc

The main character of the oldest stories in the world, with a moral arc centered around taming the ego in order to attain enlightenment, slapped on a cybertruck. Genuinely incredible

4 panel comic Panel 1: A group of people just having a lovely time. Everyone is laughing Panel 2: An absolute Federal Agent appears in the middle of the group laughing like an obnoxious robot Panel 3: The group quickly disperses, leaving the gross creepy agent by himself Panel 4: The agent touches his ear and says “arrest their moms”

the US government has arrived on bluesky

" woke Hoover guy" implies the existence of a chud hoover guy

Infected with covid via fart?

Backup cameras for cars

"Democrats can win if they act more like republicans and abandon popular progressive values"

God there really is nothing going on in that bald bean, huh?

Establishment dem reaction: well, we will just have to vote him out in 28 I guess. <act blue link>

forum wars took over the government. the 10,000-page thread spilled out into the streets. people are getting their doors blown open and hogtied so that nerds can win an online argument. they tanked the dollar and fucked the economy permanently to own you

i do think that’s where a lot of the obvious resentment for the userbase comes from. 90% of us on here doesn’t really care about the primary reason why this place exists but use his place out of sheer convenience

Is there no standing because no president has ever done anything so stupid before or is there some more outrageous reason?

@internethippo.bsky.social i was watching miss rachel with the toddler and for some reason I thought of you

this is our cracker barrel moment

These are probably the same people that think that DoorDash is a service designed to help the elderly and disabled to get food.

I simply never think about Taylor Swift

The twitter knockoff maker has opinions guys

DOGE intern dipshit: 50 million in... OYSTER SHELL RESEARCH comon, such obvious fraud DEFUNDED lmao 🤣

4 panel comic Panel 1: ICE “Agent” (thug) punches protester hard in the face. Agent: STOP Panel 2: ICE Agent viciously snaps protester’s arm Agent: BEING Panel 3: ICE Agent strangles protester Agent: POLITICALLY Panel 4: ICE Agent stamps on protester’s head Agent: VIOLENT