Very cool! Usually he drops jasper.

A little bigger than my thumb. The raven drops stones about this size!

Journalism is healing

Probably a pseudo-fossil Waterline Agate.

Today, the raven that hangs out with #GarbageMare brought her an interesting piece of agate. Not sure what the banding indicates other than an iron deposit - could it be a fossil?

I think they’re rehoming the pickles at the job fair today. This whole community is obsessed with feeding everyone.

I like walking through the campus and overhearing my colleagues talk about their problems.

Usually these problems involve having too many vegetables. This morning: “All my fridges are full of pickles. The work fridge is full of pickles. Someone needs to take some pickles.”

Apologies for interrupting this, my husband came home from work and said “We have limited time upon this earth. Can we watch something good?”

Also he’s a professor so the last thing he wants to watch is a movie about supervising shitty students even if I promise most of them will die.

We have now had multiple discussions about who’s “top of the class.”

Also “I like a full eight hours of sleep” coming from a 7th-year is hilarious

The PhD supervisor is supervising her daughter? Who okayed this?

Sorry I can’t get past why they’ve been in a doctoral program for seven years and still haven’t gotten their topic approved.

I suspect this is not an accredited program

“I offer you the opportunity to bypass your dissertation…” and all they have to to is spend a night in a haunted house and record data

a woman with her eyes closed says " what insanity is this now " Alt: a woman with her eyes closed says " what insanity is this now "

“Congratulations! You’re weeks away from graduating with your PhDs! Some of you haven’t gotten your dissertation topics approved yet…”

WHAT

Booking a class of 20 students in the large theatre is massively wasteful and unsuitable. What CLOWN is running your scheduler?

Cliché: class is full of burnouts, even the ones who are “top of the class.” The party house is dead drunk and passed out in the morning.

Not cliché: However, they all clutch bottles of top-shelf anejo.

WHERE is IRB? You want a horror movie about a doctorate or don’t you?

Watching “Death PhD” and questioning immediately whether any of the writers have met a PhD student.

Director of Machine Maintenance at Michigan Turkey Producers, an actual posting recommended by Indeed for higher education management professionals

I was looking at Indeed postings for some algorithmic evaluation purposes and honest to god based on the keywords "higher education management" it recommended I go work at a turkey farm

Life-sized velicoraptor selfie

Normal day at the library, this just showed up and nobody knows from where

I’ve done five “document for the love of Pete” seminars in the last two weeks and every single one, there’s someone who openly states they refuse to do it

You can see people mentally crossing them off their grant lists in real time, it’s pretty impressive

Me: I’m going to teach you about documentation. Documentation helps you survive audits. Failing an audit means you can lose your career and maybe go to jail.

Guy: I don’t want to learn this.

Colleagues: *physically recoil*

A picture of our President. Wait, no, it’s a horse shedding her winter coat

There are entire species of birds house with the remains of #GarbageMare ‘s winter coat

“We are pleased to inform you…”

I’M GONNA GO TO SIMMONS!!! #PhD

a cat riding on the back of a duck while a dog watches Alt: a cat riding on the back of a goose while a dog runs behind

Dean: Do you know anything about knowledge management? I'm having this problem...

My brain:

Mi iphone gas gonne back to insisting i ma italian, and its making it veri difficili ti type in english

that fucking duolingo owl never warned me

It's like this all the time! It's never bad luck, just good luck in disguise.

On-brand for my life:

3/7 My truck breaks down dramatically; Gas $2.50/gal
3/9 Diagnosis: cooked. Get a new car.
3/15 Buy a Toyota Camry Hybrid for less than KBB
3/21 Have hybrid delivered; Gas $4.25/gal
3/31 Prices rise on same Camry model by $10K

Yeah but did they return the Kit-Kats

Kit-Kats arranged on a copier.

Karina is on the case, copying lots of Kit-Kats!

Kit-Kat production line on the library copier.

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