the low-effort hack for big fucking CUT calves is to be fat and carry your own body around every day. forearms too

It’s your last chance to vote in the PENULTIMATE Pony Express poll. Poll closes tomorrow, Wednesday 4/22 at 1 pm est

as I was getting ready to get in my car, a woman who had been walking behind me said “excuse me!” and I was like “yes?” thinking it was gonna be a library question & she said “this is weird but— your calves look GREAT girl!!!”

A pen and highlighter drawing of a cat wailing and crying with exhaustion.

another day in paradise

The kids are definitely struggling, too! They don’t know how to like, use a desktop computer. If it’s not an app, they’re lost!

2-factor authentication is the absolute scourge of my existence!!!

he’s trying to apply to a job as a bus driver for the school, but it’s all online & he needs digital files of a resume and all kinds of other shit. Wonder why there’s always bus driver shortages

just helped a patron that was so completely unfamiliar with computers that he didn’t know that the keyboard was the instrument to make letters appear on screen

Wolfgang? It’s actually called a pack.

completely nonchalant

El went to work w my car keys, which has been a fear of mine for years. However. minimize time at the voting location?

“you work at [other library branch/my kids’ school/CVS]. you have pink hair.” no “yes”

“(scoffing) when did [change that occurred before I started working at the library five years ago OR misremembered thing from different library system] happen?? I was just in here???”

We recently got the “good news” that, in addition to an early voting location, we are going to be a day-of voting location every time. Which means 6356 assholes who have not entered the library in years & will not enter again til next voting are gonna come in and make my life miserable

it’s special election voting day & guess who works at the polling location 😔

what are they gonna do to protect the dugout now that Freddie’s on paternity leave???

a simple drawing, in flat color halftones of a yellow maneki neko holding an arrow and a laure wreath. She has skulls reflected in her eyes and is blowing a raspberry. Text above says “for victory over your enemies”.

For Victory Over Your Enemies ☠️ 🏹
#art

Do It For Her

when I’ve been living off of the fruits of Past Katie’s labor, but they run out, and I find myself in the position of having to be Past Katie for the benefit of a Future Katie . . .

Thanks!

me neither tbh!!

Been doing these little audio updates, and it’s been fun. Startin’ to maybe get good at it.

on.soundcloud.com/aBLdGgQ1W7T4...

I was planning to keep some dried in rings & some pulverized to dust, but I think I should have cut them before drying them! So maybe it’ll be ground & flakes

Last chance to pre-order!!

I want to make one for this year, but until then, here’s last year’s again 🧡🤍🩷

420 dehydrate it

El was in charge of planting the pearl onions this year and they went a lil overboard. There are too many for the dehydrator & STILL a whole bunch in the garden

Me, holding an onion top that’s longer than my torso, like a fisherman holding up his catch

so many green onions in a colander, waiting to be processed

The green onions in a multi-level dehydrator

the day of reaping is at hand

This IS the second-to-last update, but I anticipate writing a conclusion and epilogue, as well, so you still have like two months to get in before the very bitter end. Come on, catch up or get started so you can see the tragedy end tragically.

women of a certain age will be like “no honey, all girls fall romantically in love with their roommates in college, it doesn’t mean you’re GAY and also I would love to have a neurotypical wife”