As a not-so-friendly reminder, please do not do bumps off the toilet seat lids in the restrooms. Thank you.

whoever ate the last donut in the break room

You’re dead to me

Fire exits might seem silly with a bunch of superheroes in the building, but code says we gotta keep it clear.

To whoever parked their motorcycle in front of the fire exit, move it or it will be towed.

old enough to know that shirt is out of style

if you say the bite of 87

do you even work here

who took my last coffee pod

//: Follow my Jon Kent account or I’m gonna push you

𝑌𝑜𝑢𝑟 ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑠 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑡𝑒𝑐𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑙𝑎𝑚𝑒𝑠
𝐹𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑑 𝑤𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑠 𝑎𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑑 𝑦𝑜𝑢.

someone griefed my minecraft house

guys

there’s an emergency

Please give a warm welcome to @karawot.bsky.social who will be joining the host of heroes that make SDN super!

not until the person who filled the toilets with espresso admits to it

I’m just the social media guy

not very punk rock of you

don’t tempt me

do you think that would be a good “fit”

I’m going to publish your search history

who will be my valentine?

🥺
👉👈

//: I will be driving in about an hour so replies will be scarce until tonight.

Give a warm welcome to the very, very rad @theantipulse.bsky.social! I’m not joking. We’ve got two walking nuclear reactors.

Give a warm welcome to @jeffls616.bsky.social, who’s—.

Wait, is that just a fucking shark?

I’m just the social media manager but I’m gonna guess Supergirl won’t have trouble getting a job!

Well, she might if she calls me bitch again.

Give a warm welcome to @the-quiet-one.bsky.social, who is joining our list of heroes! Betcha didn’t see her coming!

Please give a warm welcome to one of our newest dispatchers, @averageordinary2.bsky.social! She’s a great example of how our dispatchers are extraordinary!

Everyone knows him by now but please give a very warm (and delayed) official welcome to @callhimherm.bsky.social! He’s definitely made a splash around the office!

Please give a warm welcome to @vampireheroine.bsky.social, who will be joining the group of heroes that make up the life blood of SDN!

(I dunno, puns are hard. Okay?)

//: interact with my Junkrat or suffer my curse @bombvoyage.bsky.social