how it feels to use chocolate as your delivery method for shrooms

did charlie and the chocolate factory... give me an eating disorder ??

how does that sufjan stevens song go? it's the fourth of july / we're all gonna die

being a teacher is a lot more fun when you think of it as making a bunch of people play "school"

i'll roll cat hair into my joint idgaf

beckett employed era :(

can we get some commotion for the [otherworldly, haunting noise]?

all my windows were open !!!!!! holy fuck what if they had not been open

just had my first "stove left on low for several hours unattended except for small cat" scare hoo wee

call me john appleseed (my apple seeds sprouted)

the north side of chicago as seen from a plane about to land at o’hare

paid extra for the window seat on the flight home. did not regret it one bit

man once worth 10 gazillion dollars now worth 5 gazillion dollars

beckett employed era

brings a smile to my face knowing this man suffers

why did the diary of a wimpy kid books have a distinct smell

ADULT CONTENT IS CRAZYYYYY

happy st patrick's day i do not play about the color green

ratio

I CAN SMELL BARBECUE ON THE BREEZE! SUMMERTIMEEEE!!! I DONT PRACTICE SANTERIA

snape snape severance snape

i think my cat might be getting into communism. she can't stop talking about Mao

they fucking better

a Ukrainian dude in SecondLife taught me this phrase while flying in a wheelchair

when i learned about noah's ark as a kid, i didn't understand the reproductive necessity of one female and one male from each species. i thought God wanted each animal to have a friend so they didn't get lonely.

burt and irving's outties should both be straight. it's the way of things

im like what if a gay guy was cool, and not a real guy

i watch a lot of horror with closed captions and tbh they're overusing [squelching]

Pritzker? I hardly know 'er

i cut my finger on a glass in chicago... i hope i can still dance