I haven’t really worked on Bungie.net for like almost two years. I’m a shared services engineering lead (think the shared accounts service).

The institutional Democratic Party is guided by an almost pathological level of conflict avoidance in almost every direction. “What can we do to make the least number of people mad?” is just a bankrupt way to operate.

Democratic Leaders Stand Real Still In Hopes No One Notices Them WASHINGTON—With the elected officials trying their hardest not to move a muscle, reports confirmed Monday that top Democratic leaders in Congress were standing real still in hopes that the American pe...

Democratic Leaders Stand Real Still In Hopes No One Notices Them

Chuck Schumer Helps Pull Democrats Back From Brink Of Courage

Chuck Schumer Helps Pull Democrats Back From Brink Of Courage

Trump Says Recession Unfortunate But Necessary Step To Get To Depression theonion.com/trump-s...

RFK Jr. Vows To Make Measles Deaths So Common They Won’t Be Upsetting Anymore WASHINGTON—Addressing the ongoing outbreak in Texas that has infected at least 124 state residents and killed one child, Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. vowed Thursday to mak...

RFK Jr. Vows To Make Measles Deaths So Common They Won’t Be Upsetting Anymore

Holy SHIT, that's good news!!!

Trump Boys Get Tongues Stuck To Frozen White House WASHINGTON—Flailing their arms and crying out in anguish, Eric Trump and Donald Trump Jr. were reportedly panicking Thursday after getting their tongues stuck to a frozen column near the West Wing of ...

Trump Boys Get Tongues Stuck To Frozen White House

Star Trek did say the 2020s were gonna be a little rough

2025 feels like a struggling tv show grasping for ratings, like it’s just inciting incident after inciting incident after inciting incident and a new poorly written cartoonish villain that nobody asked for and every week they somehow find a more ridiculous shark to jump

Andrew Jackson: I may be in Hell now, but I burn with the confidence that no other American president will ever top the Trail of Tears

Donald Trump: Hold my Diet Coke

Elon Musk Offers Self $10 Billion Federal Buyout WASHINGTON—Saying he was just more deadweight hampering the executive branch’s ability to function efficiently, Elon Musk confirmed Monday that he had offered himself $10 billion to resign from his position as head of President Trump’s Department of Government Efficiency. “Like many other federal employees, I too have been presented with a buyout option as part […]

Elon Musk Offers Self $10 Billion Federal Buyout
theonion.com/elon-mu...

This. This is the fundamental issue. If the government can simply declare you outside the class of people who are entitled to due process, how do you prove otherwise?

Trump Claims He Can Overrule Constitution With Executive Order Because Of Little-Known ‘No One Will Stop Me’ Loophole

Trump Claims He Can Overrule Constitution With Executive Order Because Of Little-Known ‘No One Will Stop Me’ Loophole
theonion.com/trump-c...

Comply in advance? Naw, man. That would require effort.

In terms of gamedev inefficiencies, I want to staple Don’t Read The Comments to a number of senior decision-makers’ foreheads in this industry.

It’s wild to have to talk mature adults through, but sooo many people in positions of power take anon comments as representative gospel.

Zuckerberg Says Most Companies Need More ‘Masculine Energy’ Mark Zuckerberg lamented the rise of “culturally neutered” companies that have sought to distance themselves from “masculine energy,” adding that it’s good if a culture “celebrates the aggression a bi...

I would absolutely read a 5,000-word deep-dive on whatever high-powered PR agency is charging Mark Zuckerberg tens of millions of dollars to shape his public image as a bootlicking scrub

Mark Zuckerberg Insists Anyone With Same Skewed Values And Unrelenting Thirst For Power Could Have Made Same Mistakes

Mark Zuckerberg Insists Anyone With Same Skewed Values And Unrelenting Thirst For Power Could Have Made Same Mistakes
theonion.com/mark-zu...

Man Returns To Work After Vacation With Fresh, Reenergized Hatred For Job

Man Returns To Work After Vacation With Fresh, Reenergized Hatred For Job
theonion.com/man-returns-...

I say we beat the shit out of 2025 as soon as it shows up, just as a message to any potential future years

The front page of today’s Wall Street Journal encapsulates 2024 perfectly.

Visiting your family for the holidays is like jumping back into a videogame after months of not playing. Why am I supposed to care about these little guys

Cobweb-Covered Skeleton Gripping Senate Desk Expected To Seek 15th Term -The Onion

LaGuardia sounds like a virus your dog gets from eating a gyro off the street

"Video games cause violence"

Meanwhile, me reloading my save because I accidentally made one of the characters sad

Can confirm.

Civ 6 is pretty much the only game where Mahatma Gandhi will call you a lazy, provincial dipshit before dropping an unprovoked atomic bomb on you.

Probably need a couple more years of data to solidify this but I’m pretty sure that the more that pro players and streamers hate a particular release of Call of Duty, the better the game actually is.

I feel like videogames actually do provide a pretty accurate representation of real life right now because a lot of videogames are like “THE WORLD IS ENDING” and then you just collect herbs and pretend nothing is wrong

...happy tuesday...