Everyone wonders why the tooth fairy wants teeth? What possible use could a fae have for children's teeth? It's building materials. Her home is a horror constructed of the bones and dreams of children around the world. It's impregnable.

#lore #toothfairy #3outod4dentists

Haakapainiži will sing to you in order to trick you into letting your guard down. Luckily, as a giant grasshopper his music is pretty universally terrible. It's almost as bad as the soundtrack for Disney Zombies 4. That why he preys on children, they have awful taste.

#Lore #RiseoftheVampires

Does anyone know how to remove a bloodline curse? I've already determined that Tide Pens will not remove the stain.

#lore #bloodline #TidePens

The little people will sometimes play tricks on you, but they can be mollified by leaving out a shot glass full of whiskey. Tiny sprites don't need much to get absolutely wasted.

#lore #bac #littlepeople

The schism between those that remember Berenstein Bears vs Berenstain Bears was caused by a schism in reality and the wish of one Curtis White in May of 2007. Important Safety Tip: Don't make requests of the Djinn while tripping.
#lore #Djinn #BerensteinBears

I am now back from my sabbatical. Yes, Atlantis was lovely. No, Google Fi does not work there, and in your economy I'm not paying for Verizon.

Does anyone else suspect that Tony the Tiger is actually a rakshasa?

#lore #rakshasa #theyregrrrrreat

It's commonly understood that La Llorona can be found near rivers and streams, but most people don't know that she can also be found near swimming pools, bath tubs, outdoor reservoirs, and wells. Some demonic ghosts just hate water, it doesn't have to be natural or running.

#lore #lallorona

I've been here before. Have I? This day has happened a thousand times in a thousand ways, and in all of them Red Bull hasn't given me wings. I need to switch to Red Zduhać.

#lore #zduhać

I'm sure that what everyone making fun of Trump putting tariffs on an island thought to be inhabited by only penguins is missing is that he's actually trying to stop the The Thing from utilizing its powers to overwhelm America's workers.

#lore #TheThing #HeardIsland

Many people think sleep paralysis demons all look the same, because there are so many shared characteristics that people experience. No joke, it's just genuinely terrifying.

#lore #sleepparalysis

Unicorns with wings are called alicorns. This is a clarification I never knew existed before despite my decades of research and experience, but the ten year old I was speaking with was appalled at my ignorance. I was too.

#lore #alicorn #unicorn

Sometimes legends and myths aren't related to real supernatural creatures, but they still serve a purpose. Look at Pele's curse. The National Park Service made up a story about Pele cursing people with bad luck who stole Hawaiian stones in order to protect them from the night marchers' vengeance.

Some people believe that it is Satan himself. Others that it is answering the call of its feral, dinosaur ancestry. Yet more believe that even the best beer breading won't stick. But all Colombians agree, Pollo Maligno is a bad chicken.

#lore #Colombia #pollomaligno

Much like a normal cat, the cactus cat often leaves welts and scratches on the unwary despite no real ill intent. Unlike a regular cat they do it with large spines while literally howling mad on fermented cactus juice. They need to try decaf instead.

#lore #cat #decaf #cactuscat

Lillith may be warded off using the names of three angelic beings, Senoy, Sansenoy and Semangelof. This is not, as many assume, because they're the three that cast her out of the Garden. It's because she left all three on read and it would be too awkward to run into them again.

#lore #lillith

Boo hags are only supposed to steal your breath at night. I can only conclude that my diagnosis of pneumonia is false, and I'm now dealing with some sort of turbo boo hag that steals breath all day long.

#lore #boohag #icantbreathe

Disney zombies teaches us that the real monster is metaphorical racism. That feels overly simplistic. The actual monster is whichever stylist gave that one cheerleader a pompadour. It was probably a Bruxsa confusing the middle aged actors for children she could drain.

#lore #disneyzombies

Loab is the inevitable result of us pouring our humanity into the digital space and getting nothing back. She's the void screaming back at us after being filled with our cat pictures and pornography. And it's only a matter of time before she too is too weighed down by pop-ups to function.

#lore

I'm sorry that I've blown the lid off of the narwhal conspiracy, but there's nothing more important to me than academic integrity and transparency. And the proper temperature for tea brewing.

California is currently trying to make Bigfoot their official state cryptid. This is absolute nonsense, and a further sign that lawmakers really need to listen to the experts rather than pop culture. The only cryptid that Cali should claim as official is Nancy Pelosi.

#lore #AB666 #Pelosi

Many people think that narwhals should be considered cryptids. Many others don't think they exist at all. Those people are correct. Narwhals are spillover from the pool levels of the backrooms. You didn't think that a unicorn fish evolved naturally, did you?

#lore #narwhal #backrooms

I'm sorry for the inconsistent posts this past week. I went cow tipping and the herd wound up being owned by a vittra. It's been...very unpleasant. I'd ask someone to send help, but I brought this on myself. Be kind to cows.

#lore #vittra #bekindtocows

If you see a bright neon animal hybrid you might not be on psychedelics, it might be a alebrijes. The good news is that they're generally friendly and connect based on a resonance with your soul. The bad news is that you're probably dead. Sorry.

When you're mobility challenged, say, by breaking your foot with a frozen turkey, it's important to use other methods to escape/deter aggressive cryptids. Most will shy back and hide if you ask them to call customer service for you, it's incredibly anxiety inducing.

#lore #myfoothurts

You might think you want to meet a unicorn. You don't. While the murals airbrushed on the sides of vans might be right, unicorns are incredibly holier than though and all around buzz kills. You'll have much better luck with bicorns. They might not exist, but that also won't judge you.

#lore

Pixies are generally easily lured with semi decent guitar riffs and whammy pedals. Just make sure that you believe in them, and they'll be sure to make it big.

#lore #pixies #whammy

I'm sorry to say it, but Nessie is in fact not a cryptid, just a fake. I have it on good authority that what most people think of as Nessie is actually a contraption piloted by a quad of lutin.

#lore #nessie #lutin

If you've ever identified a wermbat, I will judge you. Yes, the cubic poop makes it easy, but why do you care enough to actually check? It's not worth it.

#lore #wermbat #poop

"Angel" simply means messenger. While all such divine creatures are now classified as such, originally they were all understood to be wholly different. Seraphim, cherubim, dominions, thrones, etc were all as different as zombies are to werewolf.

#lore #angels #biblicallyaccurate