Wife 'I had a really vivid dream that you were seeing a younger woman'

Me 'Really? What was she like?'

Wife 'She was a bit fat actually'

😂

FREE TICKETS

Silly I know but I’ve penned an ode- or poem if you will- to my new favourite app, bluesky. Be kind in your judgement I beseech you my liege!. lol 🪶

Can't shoot your missus now because of woke. We used to be a country.

Hello?

Happy birthday @michaelglasper.bsky.social

Easter

Fuck. Hope all is well

Why are they interviewing some daffodils?

Aww

The David and Victoria Beckham meme in four panels. 1. Victoria Beckham, but an image has been super imposed that says: "Your items have shipped." 2. David poking his head in the door and saying, "Be honest" 3. Victoria, with an image super imposed that says: "Label created." 4. David saying, "Thank you."

every time

'No Bothans were harmed in the making of this film'

Can people please stop being mean to the Government for god's sake?!

Hey folks, if you have trouble seeing videos or gifs on Bluesky, that's because the settings for it are automatically turned off. Go into your settings and go to "external media"

I got @takisoma.bsky.social’s autobiography, SLEEPING WHILE STANDING, during the crowdfunder. But this week, Avery Hill is offering her book for 25% off, making now a great chance to pick it up if you missed it.
averyhillpublishing.bigcartel.com/product/pre-...

An ad for an anti-flake car pie, specifically formulated for car consumption

Don't let anyone ever tell you that the human race doesn't innovate any more.

hey girl are you a meal in an american diner because i would barely touch the sides

me:

the pirate i kicked in the crotch:

Would've been even better if he'd said it like Jones

GET A ROOMBA

Kosplay

Air fryers

Our Sainsbury's ran out of turkeys yesterday

People hanging around for cheap turkeys might be very disappointed this year

Happy Christmas people🎄🎄🎄🎉🎉🎉

Mate

THIS. THIS. THIS. 💯

Lovely