They made a fitbit for farts

It’s really messed up we don’t take care of elders financially. At some point, we’re all expected to live off savings. Guess we’ll just hoard all our money and hope it runs out the moment we die 🤞🤞🤞

This is like building a time machine and going back to check your email.

Ultraleap got bought by a digital musical instruments company and now they’re doing… a piano keyboard.

I get it...
but we’ve got ultrasonic haptic arrays, hand gesture detection, non-contact controllers with force feedback…

and we landed on skeuomorphing an instrument from the 1800s.

Can’t wait to get tea-bagged by Elmo in Disney’s new shooter

Save scumming was a gift from god.

💀

Do I have any web developer friends that do freelance on-call tech support?

Last I checked, Facebook forces hashtags to be all lowercase :(
they came so close to not being 💩 but took extra steps to throw it all away.

That’s hater talk

How about a fucking car for the first time in years? They’re all legally trucks.

It’s just missing a link to the Confluence page

Took 10 minutes for the rage of this to subside and for me to complete my (counts on fingers) 10-factor authentication. Almost had to take off my shoes.
all of this to find out I'll be paying +$36/year to still not get Substance Painter.
Yes, Adobe owns it.
No, Creative Cloud "Pros" do not get it.

Adobe forced me to use their 2 factor app that tries to authenticate itself.

💀

digital art. a crying cat in the center. the cat is surrounded by 2 arrows and text. left arrow points to "i wake up". right arrow points to everything happens

cat

An eflyer for an upcoming poetry class that says "Poetry-Spring '26 Featured teaching artist: Jaz (award-winning poet & educator) "Learn what makes a poem come alive... and write your own!" Virtual writing class - exploring the building blocks of poetry: imagery, rhythm, voice and more with weekly prompts and supportive feedback. • Mondays, 7:00-9:00 PM ET • March 23rd - April 27th • Online through Project Write Now via Zoom Build a toolkit of poetic techniques, write new work, revise with guidance, and grow your confidence, whether you're new to poetry or returning to it. Also featuring a session by guest teaching artist + poet KP Find the class on linktr.ee/jazzpoet Or search the course catalog on pwnwriters.org "

Check out my poetry tutor's upcoming class
pwnwriters.org/course/poetr...

If music was reviewed like videogames are:

"This metal song has too much drums."

"I wish this song wasn't metal, I like Rap. It should be Rap."

"The song is good but they should hire a new singer"

"The thing is they're using Gibson guitars, they need to switch to Fender and it'll sound better"

I’m sorry you’re constantly pummeled with the worst parts of the world instead of daring to shine in your little corner of it.

It is my prerogative to change my mind as a woman. Rule doesn’t apply to us.

Steam community requesting additional body types for added immersion.

A large block of sentient tofu

Steam community: “Can we play as a male character?”

Me (indie dev in this economy):
“Best I can do is sentient tofu.”

A stylized illustration of the Pokemon character creature, Bulbsaur, but with a pastel, sweets/ice cream theme to it instead of its normal, usual look.

as sweet as bulbasaur 🍨 #pokemon

updating my updater

Remember when Zuck said he was adding legs to VR but the entire demo was canned motion capture and instead they just put in some inverse kinematic-sorta legs and you couldn’t even see your own legs, only other people’s?
NEVER FORGET WE WERE PROMISED LEGS AND EVERYONE GOT LEGS BUT YOU.

Stones and rocks for every month

My friend Eddie is sweet and reliable if anyone in the Seattle area needs a pet sitter.

Etsy is kicking off witches? All that will be left is drop shipped stuff from the same places as amazon get it

I do Squarespace. They’ve got the whole ecosystem, from buying the URL to hosting and even doing transactions on the site. Also they work responsively so your window dimensions can be many sizes without sacrificing the design.

They’re hoping your finger will slip one of these times

💀