It just wasn’t meant to be I guess…

Everyday feels like the twilight zone lately

The Robbie Williams monkey movie only making 1.9mil in the US is the funniest thing I’ve seen all week

Hello I’m back with a vengeance

It’s going down

White boys just don’t dance like they used to :(

Just a FYI don’t use the phrase “crashing out” in corporate America

I could absolutely not care any less about what your elf on the shelf has been up to

if it's not a shitpost what the fuck are you even doing with your life

Oh and only hot and funny people follow me so you do the math

Officially started a folder called “reaction pictures” so I’m ready to lock in

Trisha Paytas getting a show on broadway genuinely blows my mind she needs to teach a class in manifestation

I didn’t know anything about Wicked two weeks ago and today I’m looking forward to putting together my wicked lego set. I love being an adult with adult money.

Bury me with my heating pad

I’m not convinced it wasn’t his evil twin waluigi

Pet loss is strange because that was my child but to someone else it’s “just a cat”

So cute!

I need a good cry, what movie should I watch?

My New Year’s resolution is to make a phone call without having to rehearse what I’m going to say beforehand

Ever since I was a baby I dreamed of shitposting

relax people, there are enough delusions to go around

[convincing a zoomer to wear a condom]

babe you gotta spotify wrap it

Thank you thank you 😂

Me after doing one task at my easy job that pays me well

I just followed you (i like to rebel)

It’s wine Wednesday! You know what that means! (It will be like every other night but at least I will be drunk)

My house is a prison (I work from home)

I’d probably give them my data if they asked nice enough

Don’t scare me like that

I’m not allowed to watch My Strange Addiction anymore because I find myself saying “let me see what all the hype is about”